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2 thingz (rapper) - airborne lyrics

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i did things i never wanted to do
i did it cause you wanted me to
you said it’s part of love and i do
remember saying i was loving it too
but i was stuck and now i’m running it through
when i was younger i was molding myself
i couldn’t keep control of myself

you calmed me down enough to tell me i was moving
but the feelings i remember now are constantly disproving it and i can’t get a hold of myself

you told me i was wrong
n0body loves you or at least they don’t for long
you told me that your father said that love was just a waste
that n0body could wait
that saying i still love you is a promise i should break
a chance you’ll never take
you stopped me in my tracks and made me think i was to blame
for threatening and blood and all the hatred and the shame
and all the nights we wasted sitting silent and restrained
i told you what you meant to me and all i got was no
and somehow it p-ssed on to me it’s harder when it shows
i’m happy now but i cannot feel anything but snow
numb me with your temperature and kiss me when you go

i never made it to your farm town
and if i did i knew you’d f-ck me when my guard’s down
you used to make me into harsh sound
anger, understanding, and a lack of self ident-ty
i’m honestly surprised that i’m not trying to take part now
but maybe lying is an art now

i will never forget the night that i told you i didn’t believe in our love
i was sitting on the carpet in the bathroom outside the shower, while the shower was turned on, at my grandparents’ house
and it was the middle of the f-cking night
i was texting you, telling you, “maybe we say ‘i love you’ too much. like, more than we should for 15-year-olds.”
and i know that that’s harsh, and i know that that’s not what you say
but you came back to me and you said that the last time you heard someone say that, they broke you heart
and i told you that i wasn’t trying to break your heart
and you threatened to k!ll yourself
and i was sitting there, outside the shower at my grandparents’ house in the middle of the f-cking night, only about 2 hours away from you, and i kept thinking, “what if she’s dead?”
and i kept thinking that it was my fault if you were
and now that i look back on it, that’s really f-cked
it’s really f-cked
no 15-year-old should have to worry about suicide, much less be faulted for someone else’s
so thank you for making me the person that i am
but f-ck you for making me live my life the way that we did when we were together
that’s it, this is all i needed
i’m good



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