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@9yoshii_sidewayz7 - suicide lyrics

{ introduction jay; um an if you listen to his music he talks about his drug addiction he talks about his drug problems he talks
about a lot of it he… he… expresses pain an tha crazy thing is we..
we don’t really read into these things as much when we listen to
music we don’t really listen to tha words, we don’t… we don’t see
tha words for what they are sometimes when uh i could relate to
this on artists experience who deals with… with… with depression
& mentally illness…

{ verse one jay; so many thoughts inside my f-ckin mind searching
phantoms but i feel like i’ve been walking blind so many signs but
i don’t know witch ones accurate trying to vent my problems but
n-body’s really grasping sh-t so i just shut down an i don’t speak a
f-cking word an people question why the f-ck i’m acting so observe but you don’t understand tha conflict i’ve been dealing wit hatred in my soul yo my heart ain’t really feeling sh-t an i’ll
admit that i’ma proudct of my misery, misery loves company but
i’m so f-cking sick of me an i don’t open up so i can get some sympathy i open up so you could see tha line of symmetry cause
you an i probably more alike then you may think plate full of problem but we wash em up on different sinks i said we wash em
up on different sinks don’t judge a book by it’s cover nothing’s what it’s seems another night is just another bottle fill my stomach
up with liquor an my heart wit sorrow grandma told me i should put my trust within the bible but these words ain’t making sense to me just like a ” typo ” many times in my life i’ve been suicidal put tha
pills in my mouth but i wouldn’t swallow wouldn’t swallow cause i never been a f-cking quitter i always fought back to battles witch
my life delivered reconsider how i’m blessful where the f-ck i’m at
an how could i move forward if i’m always looking back? there ain’t no future if your so caught up within your past an if you step
on gl-ss guarantee tha pain won’t last just gotta keep it pushing
never let yo guard down (x2 feed yo faith homie let yo fears starve out, feed yo faith homie let yo fears starve out that’s tha
reason why i pour my f-cking heart out!!

{ hook jay; i deal with this sh-t, this is something i’m not proud of i’ve expressesed it to you guys so many times before i’m not proud of it tha sh-t you guys hear in my music is real me wanting to k!ll myself an.. an when i talk about my music an i wanna k!ll myself whatever hang myself yada yada that sh-ts real these are my thoughts this is how i really f-ckin feel my heart i’m depressed my heart i’m hurt i can’t control this sh-t…

{ verse two lil’yoshii; eyy yo jay? i gotchu homie check it… (clears throat) they say you could see tha rain before you could see tha sun you could see my heart but you’ll never feel my pain my mamma always crying acting like she happy but i know that she lying an i can’t front it’s hurting me bad it’s another day another struggle just another hustle so i can f-ckin eat lately these hard times make ya wanna holler walking down this road it’s getting h-lla difficult to follow waking up everyday praying asking god will you get to see tomorrow? i’m trying to make it in this life of sin i’m living in ain’t no ladder down here but i’m still climbing i’ve been living rough but i feel like a ” diamond ” bet if you clean me up i’ll start shining i’m tired of being broke, homeless, an poor everyday i be fighting an i don’t know what it’s for why am in a war i don’t even understand me i’m out here tryna feed my family but y’all don’t even notice me since i’m broke an on tha streets they don’t even throw no dough at me they tell me hopelessly one day you gone shine but i guess i ain’t there yet cause probably it ain’t my time….

{ outro jay; because you could listen to his music & his post on instagram an sh-t it’s a cry for help tha dude was talking about
you know leaving… leaving his life ending his life soon ina he was
expressing that an people really don’t pay no mind to that sh-t! people you know… people just think it’s music they think he just you know probably just wants attention an he’s just tryna be this & that an he doesn’t really feel that no motherf-cker this is real… we really deal wit this sh-t we really f-ckin deal with this sh-t an then when sh-t gets real then motherf-ckers really wanna attend to tha problem at hand it takes sh-t to get real before people start showing they really give a f-ck & that’s the truth that’s the f-cking truth!!!

- 9yoshii_sidewayz7 lyrics

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