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a taste of chaos - overfilled water bucket lyrics

locked up in these chains, i can’t do this; i want myself to be set free
and i cannot choose the best, ‘cause the worst has already chosen me
it’s because my mind’s not sharp, it’s like a b-tter knife, i can’t seem to find the key
i have swum, but i think it has already sunk deep into the sea

but i don’t know, it couldn’t have sunk deeper than anger has sunk into my blood?
my lies didn’t hit her the way they hit me in such a running flood
rage live in the shadows, and shadows hides beneath my skin
real eyes realize real lies, and that this skin is hard to live in

my tears fill the clouds, i think it will rain, i am not proud
take the time to listen; i want to read my chapter out loud
hope is overused and darkness covers me in a cloak
words unsaid left scars in my head, now i’m choking in this smoke

had enough, my heart isn’t something you can borrow
the water of lies, pain, heartbreak, anger and sorrow
it fills my bucket of endurance; it overflows, my way is getting narrow
my fate’s been set unknown in every tomorrow

(my crying couldn’t become any louder
my head says my scream couldn’t have been any prouder)

i criticize her actions, feeling like a s-d-st, wanna’ see her in lots of pain
wanna’ mess with her mind; open her skull, meaning to penetrate her brain!
‘cause what i feel is impossible to neither understand nor to even explain
your terrible mind uses pretty eyes as disguise. my spit in your face will forever remain
the creation of god and all that is good has gone out of order
i don’t wanna’ waste my time, but i let her play with me, ‘cause i try not to bore her
therefore, i’ll make some fun out of it and put my knife in your corner, and while i gut you, i’ll film it and save it on a recorder
wanna’ rip up her chest and finally find her heart
she’s begging to leave; but i can’t reply ‘cause i’m laughing too hard

but wait, why do i act as if i am the one to place the blame?
i found that betrayal doesn’t come from one’s enemies
the man in the mirror is the one filled with the most shame
you finally k!lled the person who used to be me, but i know that some of it is my bad
so why are my words filled with insanity, and why am i mad over the angel who i never had?

can’t just be a friend, it is too weak. now i am tired, but not because i need to sleep
dreams were supposed to become true, but i forgot nightmares was dreams too. feel i wanna’ weep
dark lights me up while i try to bury you, i hope the tracks will be unseen
but, hey! i’m smiling, i’m godd-mn alright! i just found that silence is the most powerful scream!

i finally found your love
it was inside my head
the whispering from above
drags me closer to the dead

and it’s all because the way you made me devastated
i wanted you decapitated
the only thing i knew about was you and i, and we were separated
aggravated
drown you from the broken ship, but that’s exaggerated
no, it’s not, you little b-tch, ‘cause you deserve it, piece of sh-t
i’m spitting a brick at your flattety t-t
the relationship had to sink
now i have to admit
that lately i’ve been thinking that i’m going insane
and it may look like i’m stuck in the sane
but this is how i look when i pretend i don’t feel any pain!

rain (rain) comes in the mornings, not always at nights. (nights)
and all that’s left is mourning; i’ll never be able to find the lights. (lights)
i am gone now
this corpse is all blue
the art of lying
will make me speak true
the light turned to dark
parts of my soul are missing
why weren’t i good enough, (my love)?

i need to gather up thousands of my confessions
i will no longer act as if you’re one of my possessions

you were everything i ever wanted, but never in this way
i wouldn’t be with me neither, so it’s okay if you won’t stay
don’t want this neither, cannot control it. it is so unnecessarily dramatic
but after this running and disappearing, i have become so asthmatic

while i was telling you, i saw you crying
i may have looked cold, but on the inside i was dying
the bucket has fallen; presence of anger is no longer here
sorrow stands before it, but it will soon disappear
i was reaching for a hand that was never there
a fragment about extinction of my tear. (tear, tear)

[guitar solo]

since i’ve fallen so many times
i can finally reply
that jumping from the wrong –
the good will make me fly

you made me crazy
and you may have taken lots from my soul
but you cannot ever take my pride

something tells me that i might find
that and an eye for an eye will make us both blind
gained some peace in my mind
and all the things that we’ve done
i have finally left behind
the bucket’s hopefully empty
i’ve learnt ‘cause you’ve been heartless
i found that all the stars
can’t shine without a little darkness

i pity you when you tried to bury me, because you probably didn’t know that all along i was a seed
leaving me in the soil made me realize that my favourite flavour would eventually concede
i wanted power of love, not love of power. don’t think i ever wanted to hurt you, ‘cause that would probably destroy me
if there’s rain and some sunlight, there’ll be a rainbow. everything seemed grey, but the colours are now easy to see
i chose what made me happy instead of what was right, ‘cause happy has always been right
losing the feelings of every yesterday, that hid behind my smile. above every mighty storm, the sun will always shine bright

something hits me, and it makes every shadow stand behind me, it’s light
my silhouette hopefully stands where it should
birds sing, there is all blue in my sight
everything inside and out seems to be good
so, the bucket was just filled with anger and pain, right?
no happiness and good in there, right? knock on wood?

emptied the bucket, and it’s no longer a mystery
that my good emotions flowed out as well, and that time has come to misery
time has come to misery

can you feel it?
no …
oh, god …

save me from myself! (or what i’ve become)
but can i k!ll someone who has already died?

through sleepless nights
myself and i discovered that stars do not last forever

silence speaks when words can’t
(empty) x14
time has come to misery

- a taste of chaos lyrics

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