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a. ward, loso (battle rapper) - it's ok to not be ok (spoken word) lyrics

[a.ward & loso]
is it okay to not be okay?
i know i’m free to think
but right now i’m staring down a barrel of emptiness
and i can’t even blink
you see, depression’s feeling larger than life
well, a. ward, it sounds like you need a shrink
but stay strong, bro
cause a team’s only as good as their weakest link
so, are you saying it’s not okay to be not okay?
well, as a leader they all tell you just to leave it all alone
and lead the people to believe you aren’t bleeding on your own
so no, i guess not
well, well then i don’t want it
i mean all this pressure of a prophet never profits
would you stop it?
setting the bar up high
and then placing it near a standard knowing i’ll never stop it
look this is nonsense
but i’m sure you gon reb+ttal
when it comes to mental health 1 in 4 of us will struggle
look i get it, i see that stat listed
but what am i supposed to do when its clear that my path different?
oh, i don’t know
how bout realizing that we’re on the same team
cause when triggers in the street k!ll people, it goes mainstream
meanwhile i have triggers in my mind everyday
that do the same thing
what you know bout+the failures, the fear, being left stranded
home alone feeling trapped like the wet bandits
and satan robbing you of all your joy
you feel like k!lling that dude
that’s when depression sets in and+
wait, depression?
ayo, ward i deal with that too
i mean it’s all internal, nothing helps
every drug is more twisted
i can’t even get to the end of my rope
cause my emotions are playing tug+of+war with it
can we face this question?
how am i supposed to pray to heaven for a major blessing
if he gave this lesson?
even the church makes it seem like my disease is something that they hate to mention
so we might seem worried like it’s the 1930s
cause ever since my stock dropped n0body wants to invest in this great depression
and ironically, depression isn’t great
i mean it’s draining all my energy and lessening my faith
and it gets even worse when reaching out to the ones you love
becomes a set back
cause you feel more rejected and alone when they don’t take time to text back
i’m a burden
i’m worthless
i lack friends
i lack purpose
n0body understands how bad i’m in a bind
they tell me happiness is mind over matter
but i’m telling myself over and over
that i don’t matter in my mind
it’s okay to not be okay
when life is backwards and you feel ko’d
worn out like play clothes
you feel you’re missing something
the purse is where you have your pills buried but you don’t make a joyful noise when they hit your stomach
i mean all the prescription
causing affliction
still my thoughts are in prison
i promise this is not for attention
ay, what you know about finally getting a call from a friend then+
they ask what you did that day
you can’t muster up the courage to tell them that “tch”
you barely got out the bed and walked to the kitchen
you see when a doctor said someone has cancer
you turn emotionless
and if a doctor says your son has a fracture
you trust it’s broke a bit
if a doctor says you’re diabetic
you start controlling it
but when a doctor diagnosis you with a metal illness
they tell you suck it up
get over it
you see there’s a chemical imbalance in my head
it’s not trickery
things that are normal to you, are like a gift to me
you get out the bed and shower, that’s ritually
if i get out the bed and shower, that’s like a victory
are you kidding me?
bro it’s no different
my depression, i just sulk in it
and my addiction is a by+product cause i just buy products to help my cope with it
who am i fooling?
i know my brand is generic, i’m just lost in it
and my best choice is to find great value in not being authentic
it’s okay to not be okay
lord do you remember promising to be my awesome therapy?
do you remember saying trust not to fall for anything?
cause i remember it clearly
and my thoughts are k!lling me
why is my mind racing while i’m trying to jog your memory?
it’s okay to not be okay
lord do you remember promising what you’d do for me?
saying nay that wait upon the lord, you shall renew their strength
how long do i have to wait in this darkness cause you’re losing me
my quest for your love is hindered by black thoughts
and they’re rooted deep
so it is okay to not be okay
i know the burden is strong
and the topic has been taboo’d for what seems to be an eternity long
but every day, hurting people are seen searching for god
and it’s of the utmost importance for the church to respond
see you are loved
we are here
give a hug
lend an ear
i am you
you are me
we are his
christ is near
he could’ve easily made us sit in this h+ll
but he chose to suffer for us
and also with us as well
you see we both can
help the people stand
by telling us he took our whips like the repo man
i’m yelling “ay, man”
two palms
saving
groupons
a warrior who came in
the form of a man like mulan
look it’s no need to have resentment in life
understand that your mental illness actually makes you a walking billboard for the contentment of christ
and if this is not you
you can still show love, empathy
there’s a ton of hope you can give
cause if you aren’t struggling with mental illness
the chances are, someone close to you is
so christian, don’t allow satan to magnify depression
cause sometimes god will weaken the messenger
just so he can amplify the message

it’s okay to not be okay

- a ward loso battle rapper lyrics

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