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aberrant construct - neoteny lyrics

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soaking in my shame alone
sulking about my existence
decisions all reminiscent of children
everything’s gone wrong
constantly, incessantly, obsessively, and desperately i yell into the vacuum i created in my mind

i wish i could go to sleep and never wake up again!
i can’t take the pressure of life relieve me of this agony!

nothing i will try to do will ever be enough
never f-cking living up to my expectations
every attempt blocked by someone
every time i take a step someone comes up to push me back
no one ever helps me up. they all just plot against me

why would i ever turn my f-cking back and give away all my trust to you?

gambling all of the emptiness i’m desperately holding on to
you will never tear into me break into me want me to be better than dirt

the pain and strife, grief and plights have taken their toll
i’m not sure that i can handle another fight within myself

raging through life and losing any amount of respect that i had built up with any person that i have encountered
i let them all down and i burned them too badly
i’ve lost the faith that anyone had in me



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