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actuallyxix - long time lost lyrics

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[verse 1]
trapped in a mind not lavish
innocent kid in world so savage
caught up with a fever in this moldy cabin
wishing you would hold me closer (closer)

always caught not being average
hard to not spit when my coughing’s a habit
lately my behaviors been awfully erratic
but i still wish you’d hold me closer (please)

cause sometimes i’m so cold
bad thoughts in my head growing mold
cause they’ve been there so long
ain’t no telling how long
makes me wonder how long i can live with no soul
no goals

nothing for me to look forward too
trapped inside a maze and always feeling like they’ve cornered you
put inside a box feels like i’m lying in the morgue with you
and you don’t understand but i can talk until you sorta do

or at least i can try
one out of one thousand thoughts at a time
and it will take time
just be patient

[chorus]
i’ve spent a long time lost
gone through fake friends lot of lines been crossed
days where i felt i could leave with no cost
and many more days where i had no cause
i’ve spent a long time lost
gone through fake friends lot of lines been crossed
days where i felt i could leave with no cost
and many more days where i had no cause
no purpose
at that moment i was worthless

[verse 2]
so i switched that sh-t
i didn’t like my life so i made a new version
kept true to my person
and found a new purpose
and now in not lost
now i spend my days just dropping these songs
and i’m dropping their jaws
cause i’m nothing but me
i love all my flaws
and i finally have a cause
and i finally have a-
yeah

long time lost
nah, nowadays see i’m my boss
and i always h-t the people with the shock and awe
i never even asked for the claps or applause
i’m just me
i’m in the cl-ss with the clowns
who is this kid yeah he raps and he’s loud
and i feel great but no ones asking me now
in the end it was myself who i actually found

me: “woooo! aw man, thats hot. thats hot! long time lost nah nowadays see i’m my boss.”
shelby: “i’m trying to give you a hug!”
me: “ah! i can’t hug you my headphones cord isn’t long enough.”

- actuallyxix lyrics

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