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adamariz - external lyrics

[intro]
woah, yeah, yeah, yeah
feels like, feels like
feels like, feels like, feels like

[verse 1]
feels like i’m 19 again, the walls are caving in
i’m losing all my friends
expressing myself with random sayings that are french
i don’t know why i let the anxiety take over
i needed closure
but wasn’t anyone there to hold my hand
felt like a stranger in a foreign land
felt like an outcast, can’t let go of my past
clocking into church like, hey staff
but there was no pay stub
i felt like i was paying my own sin off
but i didn’t make enough, debating taking off
lеaving services early to sеrve another god
idolatry has entered into the coliseum we call church
we normalized, letting people leave hurt
let their names get dragged in dirt
let them k!ll themselves then send their family an encouraging word
but that ain’t how christ works
you gotta sit with them, cry it out and hug them till they feel they can breathe again
they probably saying i’m reaching
then why is it when i’ve tried it, the feedback won’t stop reeling in
like the souls we catching, i’m literally fishing for women and men to come to him
lay it down at the father’s feet, forget your sins, repent
if you don’t comprehend something, ask questions
just cause my phone on do not disturb
don’t mean i’ll quit answering
i’ll get back to you asap, i promise i’m still human

[verse 2]
i’ll get back to you asap, i promise i’m still human
so i ain’t perfect, but i know my purpose
i’m here to make sure you don’t feel like you have to leave the earth deserted
without you ever stepping into my life eternal
writing in my journal, i’m flourishing like virgil
off+white, before the cancer went and took him
maybe come off as controversial
if they try and get me and my face turn purple

[hook]
forgive me lord, you see my heart, not the external
not the external
yeah
not the external, ay
not the external
not the external
not the external

[prayer]
god, i just pray for anyone who’s been hurt
forgive me lord
pray you help them god
you see my heart, not the external
you know that at some point that was me and
i don’t want them to leave the church just cause of that
not the external
you see my heart, not the external

[outro]
i’ve been wearing a facade for so long

- adamariz lyrics

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