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af music - may 2nd lyrics

may 2nd
sounds like a normal day right?
no dark thoughts at night
you hear may and think of better days
but not for me
this day is by far the worst day of my life
it was the day
one of the most important people left me
looking to the sky screaming
“please, please don’t let it be”
it was a friday
i woke up happy
i showered, changed, and opened the tv
my dad came out the room crying
he came up to me
sobbing and sobbing yea he finally spit it out
your brother is dead
and i will never forget the thoughts i had in my head
i played down on my bed
11-year-old boy
a day that i would always dread
whenever i think about it, i just want to cry
just knowing in 1 week it will make it 5 years makes me want to die
i never think about the bad things about him
i just remember him as the best brother i had

hurts me to know the damage it has on my dad
he’s never been the same ever since
and for my mother to lose her son that was born 23 years ago
man that sh-ts f-cked up our whole entire family
like
we changed the way we communicate with each other completely
and how much we trust each other
cause we never know what might happen
the inevitable always like f-ckin comes y’know?

ever since that day i’ve wanted to die
you took a piece of me
grew your wings and started to fly
thought i would never get by
still askin’ why
fast forward 4 years
i’m stuck in a state of mind
feeling weird
growin a beard
trying to be a man
you told me about your plans
i try to be the same
i’m goin’ insane
that day we hopped on a plane
seeing your cold dead body in front of me
i stood up and screamed
“god please let this be a test!”
my chest was pounding so hard
couldn’t take a breath
do you know the toll that has on a person
you never feel free
your mind never will be clean
suicidal thoughts
please let me be
i don’t wanna die today i wanna flee
wish you left more behind
so i still have you in my mind
like a key bind
send me a sign
that’s all i’m asking
cause i’m
getting this pain to release

- af music lyrics

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