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afroman - colt45 lyrics

wait a minute man
hey check this out man (tell it!)
it was this blind man right, it was this blind man right
he was feelin’ his way down the street with this stick right?
hey. he walked past this fish market, you know what i’m sayin’ (fish market?)
he stopped he took a deep breath he said:
“woooo, good morning, ladies!”
ha+ha+ha+ha+ha!
you like that sh+t man? (that’s pretty good!)
hey man, i’ve got a gang of that sh+t, man
i’ll tell you what, my man on the guitar
hey, fool on the drum
hey, everybody’s crowding around the mic
i’ll tell you all these motherf+ckin’ jokes i got
but first i’mma start off like this, hey help me sing it, homeboy
said colt 45 and two zigzags
baby, that’s all we need
we can go to the park after dark
and smoke that tumbleweed
as the marijuana burn we can take our turn
singin’ them dirty rap songs
stop and hit the bong like cheech and chong
and sell tapes from here to hong kong
so roll, roll, roll my joint
pick out the seeds and stems
feeling high as h+ll
flyin’ through palmdale
skatin on dayton rims
so roll, roll, the ’83 cadillac coupe de ville
if my tapes and my cds just don’t sell, i bet my cabby will
well it was just sundown in small white town
they call it eastside palmdale (well.)
when the afroman walked through the white land
houses went up for sale (sale)
well, i was standing on the corner sellin’ rap cds
when i met a little girl named jan (jan)
i let her ride in my caddy
because i didn’t know her daddy was the leader of the ku klux klan
we f+cked on the bed
f+cked on the floor
f+cked so long i grew a f+ckin’ afro
then i f+cked to the left (left)
f+cked to the right (right)
she sucked my d+ck ’til the sh+t turned white
i thought to myself sheeba+sheeba
got my ass lookin’ like a zebra
i put on my clothes and i was on my way
until her daddy pulled up in a chevrolet
so i ran + i jumped out the back window
but her daddy he was waitin’ with a two+by+four
oh, he beat me to the left
he beat me to the right
the motherf+cker whooped my ass all night
but i ain’t mad at her prejudiced dad
that’s the best d+mn p+ssy i ever had
got a bag of weed and a bottle of wine
i’mma f+ck that b+tch just one more time
colt 45 and two zigzags
baby, that’s all we need
we can go to the park after dark
and smoke that tumbleweed
as the marijuana burn we can take our turn
singin’ them dirty rap songs
stop and hit the bong like cheech and chong
and sell tapes from here to hong kong
so roll, roll, roll my joint
pick out the seeds and stems
feeling high as h+ll
flyin’ through palmdale
skatin on dayton rims
so roll, roll, the ’83 cadillac coupe de ville
if my tapes and my cds just don’t sell, i bet my cabby will
i met this lady in hollywood
she had green hair, but d+mn she looked good
i took her to my house because she was fine
but she whipped out a d+ck that was bigger than mine
i met this lady from j+pan
never made love with an african
i f+cked her once, (once)
i f+cked her twice (twice)
i ate that p+ssy like shrimp+fried rice
don’t be amazed at the stories i tell ya (tell ya)
i met a woman in the heart of australia
had a big b+tt and big titties too
so i hopped in her ass like a kangaroo
see i met this woman from hawaii
stuck it in her ass and she said [aiee!]
lips was breakfast, p+ssy was lunch
then her titties busted open with hawaiian punch
i met colonel sanders’ wife in the state of kentucky
said i brought some chicken if you just f+ck me
i came in her mouth, it was a crisis
i gave her my secret blend of herbs and spices
colt 45 and two zigzags
baby, that’s all we need
we can go to the park after dark
and smoke that tumbleweed
and as the marijuana burn we can take our turn
singin’ them dirty rap songs
stop and hit the bong like cheech and chong (hey wait a minute, man, check this out…)
and sell tapes from here to hong kong
i met dolly parton in tennessee
her titties were filled with hennessy
that country music really drove me crazy
but i rode that ass and said “yes, miss daisy!”
met this lady in oklahoma
put that p+ssy in a coma
met this lady in michigan
i can’t wait ’til i f+ck that b+tch again
met a real black girl down in south carolina
f+cked her until she turned into a white albina
f+cked this hooker in iowa
i f+cked her on credit, so i owe her
f+cked this girl down in georgia
came in her mouth, man i thought i told ya
met this beautiful s+xy hoe
she just ran across the border of mexico
fine young thing said her name’s maria
i wrapped her up just like a hot tortilla
i wanna get married but i can’t afford it
i know i’m gonna cry when she get deported
colt 45 and two zigzags
baby, that’s all we need
we can go to the park after dark
and smoke that tumbleweed
and as the marijuana burn we can take our turn
singin’ them dirty rap songs
stop and hit the bong like cheech and chong
(hey wait a minute man, hey f+ck that sh+t)
and sell tapes from here to hong kong
have you ever went over a girls south to front
but the p+ssy just ain’t no good (say what?!?)
i mean you gettin’ upset because you can’t get her wet
plus you in the wrong neighborhood
so you try to play it off and eat the p+ssy
but it take her so long to come (say what?!?)
then a dude walk in that’s her big boyfriend
and he asks you where you from
so you wipe your mouth and you try to explain
you start talkin’ real fast
but he already mad cause you f+ckin’ his wife
so he start beatin’ on yo’ ass
now your clothes all muddy
your nose all bl++dy
your d+ck was hard but now its soft (what?)
you thought you had a girl to rock your world
now you still gotta go jack off
said colt 45 and two zigzags

- afroman lyrics

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