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already a thief - ptsd lyrics

[verse 1: already a thief]
can’t get an ounce of sleep
every night it all repeats
feels like just yesterday
i was standing in the rain
with my feet deep in the mud
bullets flying past my head
sh-t my best friend just dropped dead
i can’t do this anymore
i grab my gun and start to run
and this time i cannot look back
but it is just so f-cking sad
i didn’t even think again
and what i did i will regret until the end
i will be sick
i toss and turn here in my bed
every day i wish i’m dead
these thoughts keep runnin’ through my head
i’m so depressed
i wish that i could rewind time
to the day my best friend died
cuz i didn’t even cry
but now i would do anything
for him to be by my side
i would run right through a mine
just to make sure he’ll be fine
but f-ck it sucks i can’t do that
i’m stuck with this i hate myself
enough with this the sound of war it hurts my ears
it brings me tears
i drown my fears
but really i’m afraid of everything
i’m afraid of everything

[verse 2: already a thief]
war ain’t fake it’s not a game
i shot a kid right in the face
they told me that he had a bomb
we searched him he was innocent
just think of that he’s innocent
now his family’s missin’ him
and they will ask who’s fault this is
and i’ll be thinkin’ back
and it as one more thing i will regret
i hate myself for doin’ it
i really f-ckin hate myself
don’t even say you know this sh-t
cuz really you don’t know sh-t
you don’t know what i saw…
you don’t know what i’ve been through
who i vent to, what i did do
what i didn’t, wish i didn’t
but i did it i feel sh-tty it’s a pity
don’t you even look at me
the good guys always win right?
but really on the inside
victory is never in sight
cuz you’re busy aiming down sight
doesn’t that sound right?
looking back in hindsight
i would rather sleep tight at night
than get up caught in a gun fight
now i get hard nights, day dreams
i am goin’ crazy…
ptsd

- already a thief lyrics

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