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alustrium - insurmountable lyrics

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defeated, accepting it
steeped in lethargy, inertia
piling on the loss, and bleeding more
nothing left to lose, when all is lost

this journey drags on forever

methodically isolated
i’ll remove myself from the herd
stronger alone, no, but free
free from judgement, free from limits

freed to explore the bottom
to thoroughly search the depths
surveying and scanning the lower bounds
nowhere left to go but further down

once more alone, this worn out drama plays out once again
a constant struggle across time searching for a direction
disease ridden pests flock in numbers, hoping to spectate
as i climb this insurmountable obstacle

none to rely on but me
abject waste that i am
rage rushes in but flushes out
hollow now, as the ache returns
never pleased
never comforted
never letting it out

it’s not worth it

nothing can outweigh the pain of this failed existence
achieving does not rid me of this infection of guilt and shame
defiant to the end
bound and gagged trying to come out alive

this pain fills
me like a well
boiling over
threatening to spill

facing a horrid climb
these chains drag in the dirt
weighing down from birth
involuntary gauntlet

i’d rather starve than to continue on living through this
sick of trying to ascend while hopelessly burdened
defiant to the end
bound and gagged trying to come out alive
with facistic callous mandate
i’m driven to ascertain
the requirements for success
in the eyes of countless beholders

how i wish i could desert
this nonstop reckless pushing for a clean solution
there isn’t one
choosing to suffer rather than give in

this climb will lead to our deaths
we never will be truly happy ‘til its over
and still we climb
choosing to suffer and to persist rather than give in

inch by inch i’ll climb, searching for solace
searching for a handhold, hands bound all along
this quest for peace is futile
arbitrarily designed

how i wish i could desert
this nonstop reckless pushing for a clean solution
there isn’t one
choosing to suffer rather than give in

this climb will lead to our deaths
we never will be truly happy ‘til its over
and still we climb
choosing to suffer and to persist rather than give in
once more alone, this worn out drama plays out once again
a constant struggle across time searching for a direction
disease ridden pests flock in numbers, hoping to spectate
as i climb this insurmountable obstacle



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