andrew jackson jihad - gift of the magi 2: return of the magi lyrics
i used to be a dead guy
now i’m a f-cking jedi
and i’ve got lots of news for you
and i’ve got a long list of things to do
i used to dwell in the present
i used to be so hesitant
but now i’ve got my whole life to live
and i’ve got all my love to give
to all you f-ckers that i hate
it’s like the gift of the magi
it’s like the gift of the magi 2
you sold your soul to buy some t-ts
and i sold my soul to grow a d-ck
we gotta get him in the van
well what if he resists?
just kick him in the back of the f-cking head
and put him in the back of the f-cking van
it’s a miracle of science
all this betrayal and violence
and it lives inside us all
it lives inside our hearts
just like a stupid f-cking tapeworm
who can we blame?
the husband divorced his wife
after she cut her hair
because she was way less f-ckable
and that’s just unforgivable
he moved into a condo
he hung out by the pool
but he never wore a bathing suit
he just wanted to scope out the talent
if god doesn’t like ugly
then god doesn’t like anybody
so f-ck god anyway
god is obsolete
my god thinks my jokes are funny
there’s no one to blame
people are just f-cking mean
go suns!-
-(referring to the phoenix suns, a basketball team from ajj’s hometown)
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