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andy samberg - i threw it on the ground lyrics

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i was walkin through the city streets
and a man walks up to me and hands me the latest energy
drink
run faster. jump higher.
man, im not gonna let you poison me.

i threw it on the ground!
you must think im a joke!
i aint gonna be part of this system!
man, pump that garbage in another mans veins!

i go to my favorite hot dog stand
and the dude says, you come here all the time! heres
one for free.
i said, man, what i look like, a charity case?

i took it, and threw it on the ground!
i dont need your handouts!
im an adult!
please, you cant buy me hot dog man!

at the farmers market with my so-called girlfriend
she hands me her cellphone, says its my dad.
man, this aint my dad. this is a cellphone!

i threw it on the ground!
what you think im stupid?
im not a part of this system!
my dads not a phone! duh!

some poser hands me a cake at a birthday party
what you want me to do with this, eat it?

happy birthday to the ground!
i threw the rest of the cake too!
welcome to the real world, jack-ss!

so many things to throw on the ground
like this, and this, and that. and even this.
im an adult!

two hollywood phonys trying to give me their autograph.
ground! n-body wants your autograph! phonys!

then the two phonys got up. turns out they had a taser.
and they tased me in the b-tt hole.
i fell to the ground.
the phonys didnt let up.
tasing on my b-tt hole, over and over.
i was screaming and squirming
my b-tt hole was on fire!

the moral of this story is: you cant trust the system!

man!

- andy samberg lyrics

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