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angela khristin brown - depression lyrics

depression is when you l!ck the door of your and throw away the very things that are meaningful to shut out your problems because it hurts to explain what made you feel this way you just do so
depression is to shut the fuel from burning inside that melts your heart burns your flesh and you’re reaction is to runaway from admitting that you were born with a disability and you can not afford to not take medication to help you with your problem your trying to escape
depression is to isolate you from the world and your family by putting your hands in handcuffs just to contain yourself from confronting failure of not being able to communicate how you feel so you yell at the insecure voices inside that tell you things reminding you how incompetent you are why you don’t belong why you should quit because having a disability has consequences for having imperfections that your not equal
depression is to be afraid of being able to do things for myself because i’m being judged for being different like a baby who has a toy they doll they carry with them everywhere and every time i try something new they the voices cry when the doll is taken away i become a victim of neglect of needing love so i carry the burden i have no control over the feeling of hopelessness i break a bond with my life by quitting makes delusional suicidal tendencies pretending to be things i’m not and i overdose to feel the heartache pain you get from telling lies your guilty telling the lies of depression will end my insecurities of feeling rejected from hurting myself by those who hurt me
depression is to hide the fears underneath my dark blanket i use to cover scars of rejection that i am afraid of being the centerpiece at the dinner table of repugnance where love jab at my heart shaped ego and their jokes make me feel week insecure empty alone and confused my security blanket hides the hurt i carry around as a shield to protect me from crying i hide by telling lies to myself with smiles afraid to speak up the truth of depression hides the scars with words that bite backwards in time from the ridicule of self-hate of not being good enough hoping one day if only things would change but they remain locked in my mind that there is no way out there is no hope things will always be this way

- angela khristin brown lyrics

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