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angelwhisper - instructional guide on how 2 get fit lyrics

[intro: t===$$$]
alright, let’s do this together
uh

[verse 1: t===$$$]
i got called a fatass on instagram live
last time i weighed myself, i was 85
but the comments got to me, so i bought wii fit
now i’m playing wii fit
i fell off the balance board and cracked my skull open
this b+tch say “are you okay?”
no, b+tch, i’m not!
i swear to god, i just saw the instructor winking at me
she want me for real
but i have to bludgeon my ex+girlfriend to death with the balance board first
call that “first+degree murder”
they built a monument to me and called it the statue of limitations
but i have no limitations

[chorus: t===$$$]
ayy, ayy, ayy
everybody give me ten push+ups
everybody give me twenty push+ups
everybody give me ten sit+ups
now everybody give me twenty sit+ups
i was rolling with+ [violent coughing]
okay, now i’ve caught my breath
i was rolling with+ (here’s the next step)
did i f+ckin’ tell you to speak over me?
[verse 2: t===$$$]
i was rolling with the wii fit trainer
she said she wants me to train her
i said “i don’t give out rapping advice”
she jumped out the car and broke all of her bones
what the f+ck?
later, over text, she said she wants me to drain her
i said “get a plumber”
i stalked her instagram later and found out she f+cked mario
what the f+ck?!
b+tches be never telling us how they feel

[chorus: t===$$$]
everybody give me ten squats
everybody give me twenty squats
everybody give me fifty deadlifts
now everybody give me a hundred pull+ups
i want fifteen hanging leg raises
now everybody give me twenty chest flies
everybody [?]
i hope the wii fit trainer gets stung by a beehive

[verse 3: t===$$$]
i gave fifty dollars to the police
my friend, the yodeling gangster, bought an entire federal penitentiary
both of us can’t go to prison
i am a criminal for hire
(throw punches any way you want to)
[chorus: t===$$$]
everybody give me ten murders
everybody give me fifty grand larcenies
everybody give me 150 crimes of passion
now everybody give me fifty thousand dollars
email [?]
i will do anything for the right price
(except the things i won’t do)

- angelwhisper lyrics

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