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arranged in april - drowned in your silence lyrics

why act so kind now?
is it an apology
or just a way to soothe your ego
drowning the noise of your own self+hatred?

missing you feels like self+harm
peeling back my layers in slow, sharp agony
for someone who won’t notice
for someone who refused to notice

“i can’t deal with this.”(deal with this)
what happened to the days
when you said you were okay with my being
(i’m right here x2)
like a badge of purpose (but i’m right here)
“i’m the one hurt,” (i’m the one hurt)
dismissing my reasons (but i’m right here)
ignoring the plea for a thought of my feelings
(but i’m right here)
(talking to you with your back to the door)

was it a turn on to see me broken?
to see me cry, beg, and plead
for a glimpse of your attention
while you turned away to crawl into your
sorrowful, selfish, hole of pride
“i can’t deal with this.”(deal with this)
what happened to the days
when you said you were okay with my being
(i’m right here x2)
like a badge of purpose (but i’m right here)
“i’m the one hurt,” (i’m the one hurt)
dismissing my reasons (but i’m right here)
ignoring the plea for a thought of my feelings
(but i’m right here)
(talking to you with your back to the door)

does it cross your mind?
the weight of your betrayal will peel you away
and slowly bury you to nothing
while i stand and watch
as you did with me

- arranged in april lyrics

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