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asphinal - now i sit in melancholy lyrics

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[verse 1]
i can’t even look at myself anymore
the shame sends me down to pits
and when im at my lowest point
i start to consider it all
the motors turn through cogs
the plants will fend somehow
and now my god inside is weak
so i continue considering

[chorus 1]
as i look out of my window
staring at the busy streets
out there’s better for my mind
but there’s a barrier between
nothing gives me reason
searched but never have i found
life’s just trapping me within
and i’m looking to get out

[verse 2]
the cold winds now creep up on the door
my defeat is worth more than before
it stands at the front and hurts like h+ll
purging my mind like a shotgun sh+ll
i’ve let go of it all, i’ve gone too far
no grasp on the real world, i know i’m done

[chorus 2]
i’d take upon these feelings
if it wasn’t for the past
time so casually proceeding
worn off on my face and arms
“i have lost the need for needing”
ruled out from my aching heart
anything ever accomplished
is in pages torn apart

[chorus 3]
i can’t do nothing about this
time had taken me to go
restricted myself from
solutions
now i recognize my faults
then i tell myself it’s nothing
but i know and truly fear
that i’ve driven into turmoil
and the end is nearing me
oh

[outro]
this was all my fault
i’m sorry for the way i’ve been
no more to write
i’ve already said everything
these rocks piled up
i stood in my melancholy
but their edges so sharp
crushed my self undoubtedly



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