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aurelio voltaire – santa claus is satan lyrics

christmas is a special time cause it’s the birth of christ
you could go worship him at church, that’d be nice
but instead you are home! and that is because..
you’re waiting for a jolly ol’ elf they call santa claus
some say he’s a saint but i think it’s a trick
how do you get from ol’ chris kringle to ol’ saint nick?
now ol’ saint nick is crafty! but you must be quick
take away the saint and all you got is ol’ nick
makes ya think doesn’t it?

santa claus is satan and it’s so clear to see
he dont mind the raging fires in your chimney
he took a p-ss from christmas m-ss and now you are home waiting
for an elf to give you wealth cause santa claus is satan

[spoken]
hahaha! oh you dont believe me? are my views too extreme?
seriously? an elf..dressed up all in red coming into your house at night and luring you away from the true meaning of christmas? with things? sigh…all right. maybe i’ll convince you with this next verse!

[sung]

i know what you’re thinkin’ he lives in the north pole
they ain’t got no fire up there! h-ll, all they got is snow!
but ask any russian from agoolag and he’ll tell
ain’t no mortal man can stand a place so cold as h-ll!
he’s got 9 familiars and they pull his sleigh
don’t you think it’s strange a reindeer should float that way?
rudoplph with your nose so bright tell me and don’t lie!
what kind of devilry would make a reindeer fly?
oh i know why!

[spoken]
still dont believe me?! i’ll break it down for you in simple a-b-c’s!

[sung]

s-a-n-t-a is s-a-t-a-n
s-a-n-t-a is s-a-t-a-n
oh, s-a-n-t-a do i gotta say it again?
i’ll do you one better! just change one letter!
and it’s s-a-t-a-n!

[spoken]
he’s not trying that hard to hide himself, is he? just moving one letter? that’s some lazy devil bullsh-t right there!

[sung]
so, if you’re a christian, please listen to me
go into your living room and chop down your pagan tree
get rid of that yule log and that paganry
now i dont mind christmas time but i hate hypocrisy

s-a-n-t-a is s-a-t-a-n
s-a-n-t-a is s-a-t-a-n
oh, s-a-n-t-a do i gotta say it again?
i’ll do you one better! just change one letter!
and it’s s-a-t-a-n!

because santa claus is satan and it’s so clear to see
he don’t mind the raging fires in your chimney
he took a p-ss from christmas m-ss and now you are home waiting
for an elf to give you wealth cause santa claus is satan

santa claus is satan and it’s so clear to tell
tell me where an elf is from. you know the answer’s h-ll!
he took a p-ss from christmas m-ss and now you are home waiting
for some imps give you gifts because santa claus is satan!
santa claus is satan ’cause santa claus is satan!

[spoken}

merry christmas everybody! oh god i think i ruined another holiday….

- aurelio voltaire lyrics

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