adam sandler – cordurory blues lyrics
cordurory blues
when i was a boy
there was no limit to what i could eat
shake after shake after shake after shake
followed by all kinds of red meat
metabolism runnin’ around so fast
my body never gained to weight
that p-ssed off all my momma’s friends
and made my big-boned sister irate
but now i’m a man
and all that frolicking has caused my ego to hurt
’cause even when i’m in the shower alone
i’m to embarr-ssed to remove my shirt
what made a millionaire out of mr. frito-lay
made a fat mother f-cker outta me
what made a millionaire out of mr. frito-lay
made a fat mother f-cker outta me
and all them cookies i been munching lately
my feet are becoming difficult to see
i believe it was my daddy
who led me to this eating disease
by calling me “the little candy -ss”
when i couldn’t finish a burger with cheese
or maybe it was my momma
who got me addicted to all the wrong foods
only when i gobbled down every chicken cutlet
would i get to see momma’s good moods
they said eat this, they said eat that
to stay skinny there was no chance
and now when i walk i hear corduroy
even though i ain’t wearing pants
what made a millionaire out of mr. frito-lay
you fat f-ck, you fat f-ck
made a fat mother f-cker outta me
what made a millionaire out of mr. frito-lay
you fat f-ck, you fat f-ck
made a fat mother f-cker outta me
and all that ice cream i been eating lately
my chins alone weight 203
the diet starts tomorrow!
i have a grapefruit for breakfast
for lunch a bowl of white rice
dinnertime it’s a saltless potato
i ain’t allowed no spice
if this diet’s gonna work
tonight i can’t eat no more
“just go to sleep,” i say to myself
as i close the bedroom door
two in the morning, i wake up to p-ss
my belly’s hungry and achin’
tiptoe to the kitchen, f-ck the diet
bring on the chips flavored with bacon
what made a millionaire out of mr. frito-lay
made a fat mother f-cker outta me
what made a millionaire out of mr. frito-lay
made a fat mother f-cker outta me
and all them crumb-cakes i been eating lately
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