bad history month - staring at my hands lyrics
inevitably all my molecules dissolved and then my problems were all resolved
i spent a lifetime deciding which way i should go and now that i’m gone i finally know:
i know that i have always been exactly what i’m supposed to be, nothing more or less than grandpas answer to mortality
nervous outside of a bar, i focus on a single star until it disappears
reaching for the comfort of just how small things are
imagination thinks of itself as reality, but it just imagines itself to be
the greatest use i ever found for mine is traveling timе by turning myself into the sea. (of infinity)
staring at my hands and picturing thеm decomposing
feeling my existence as a ripple on an endless ocean
not even a drop
i will take no substance with me when i’m gone
because my body is the same as the sea
and this consciousness i think of as “me” is nothing more than
the imagined separation between things
dying while you’re still alive
suddenly you’ve opened your eyes
it’s only when you realize that you’re going nowhere that you finally arrive
i have seen my own death and it made me breathe easy
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