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barenaked ladies - careless lyrics

i guess i lied to you when i told you i like baseball
it’s not so much the game i like, it’s the hats

ed, do you see this black band ’round my neck? (oohh yeah)
it’s not just fashion (oh really? )
hartz made it to protect me from ticks, fleas, and gnats
i couldn’t care less, what’s in a chocolate mousse?
i couldn’t care less, what are the five fruits in five-alive juice?
i couldn’t care less, how old are ernie and bert?
i couldn’t care less, where does barney rubble work?

well sh-ggy said to velma, “hey now, velma, how ya doin’? ”
and velma said, “geesh, sh-g, i’m just fine.”

and daphne said to fred, “hey let’s get drunk down in the forest.”
and all night fred was yackin’ up red wine

i couldn’t care less, why was fonzie cool?
i couldn’t care less, are the sweat hogs still in school?
i couldn’t care less, how do they fill the caramel bar?
i couldn’t care less, if my car says the door is ajar?
well i wish i had a nickname like crusher, snake, or kenneth
’cause guys with nicknames always get the gals
when i grow up i’ll name my children alice, albert, and alfred (really cool names)
i’ll call them for supper like this: “dinner’s ready, als!”

i couldn’t care less, what morton downey says?
i couldn’t care less, what’s on the head of my pez?
i couldn’t care less, do zoodles need a trained zookeeper?
i couldn’t care less, why’s the super big gulp cheaper?

i couldn’t care less, what’s in a chocolate mousse? (ground-up antlers)
i couldn’t care less, what are the five fruits in five-alive juice?
(apples, cheese, broccoli…)
i couldn’t care less, how old are ernie and bert? (they’re like four or something..)
i couldn’t care less, where does barney rubble work? (n-body knows!)

i couldn’t care less, why was fonzie cool?
i couldn’t care less, are the sweat hogs still in school?

- barenaked ladies lyrics

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