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barton carroll - past tense lyrics

[verse 1]
well, little miss professor’s got a problem with me
ever since you went and got a master degree
you seem to think i didn’t get enough school
can’t be seen on campus with a doggone fool
now, momma always taught me to say “yes’m” and “please”
you know the strict ladies get me weak in the knees
but if my way of speakin’ gets you thinkin’ i’m dense
baby, you can put us in the past tense
(baby, you can put ya’ll in the past tense)

[verse 2]
now, if i ask what’s wrong you say “it’s not you, it’s me”
and if i ask “who’s him?” you say “it’s not ‘him’, it’s ‘he'”
my sentence composition is so far from refined
my participles danglе like a fish on a line
if i take a pеn to purty things in my head
then all my lovely notes get corrected in red
when ev’ry single sentence seems to shorten your breath
baby, do you wanna sentence me to death?
(baby, do you wanna sentence him to death?)

[verse 3]
well, you get so dramatical when i can’t be grammatical
i wish you’d take a sabbatical from crackin’ the whip
i can’t whisper sweet nothin’s to you until you loosen your grip (can’t whisper nothin’s ’til you loosen your grip)
i won’t hang around waitin’ on you to learn to swing those hips
i’m gonna get a girl slender and tall
great big lips and no brain at all
that little redhead is so natural and free
y’know, eighteen years is enough for me
i seen her front and center in the classes you teach
you know my regulations always been outta reach
and if the situation’s gonna make you wince
well, baby you can put me in the past tense
(baby, you can put ‘im in the past tense)
baby, you can put me in the past tense

- barton carroll lyrics

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