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ben folds - army lyrics

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well i thought about the army
dad said, son you’re f-cking high
and i thought, yeah there’s a first for everything
so i took my old man’s advice
three sad semesters
it was only fifteeen grand spent in bed
i thought about the army
i dropped out and joined a band instead

grew a moustache and a mullet
got a job at chick-fil-a
citing artistic differences
the band broke up in may
and in june reformed without me
and they’d got a different name
i nuked another grandma’s apple pie
and hung my head in shame
oh no

i’ve been thinking a lot today
i’ve been thinking a lot today

whoooaah, i think i’ll write a screenplay
whoooaah, i think i’ll take it to la
whoooaah, i think i’ll get it done yesterday
aw, sh-t

in this time of introspection
on the eve of my election
i say to my reflection
god, please spare me more rejection
’cause my peers they criticize me
and my ex-wives all despise me
try to put it all behind me
but my redneck past is nipping at my heels

i’ve been thinking a lot today
i’ve been thinking a lot today
i’ve been thinking a lot today
i thought about your mommy…



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