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beth fowler & charles goff - if i became the president lyrics

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[mrs. draper]
if i made you the ruler
of this great democracy

[holmes]
then i’d make you first lady
which is reciprocity

[mrs. draper]
imagine how delightful life
will be when we’re on top

[holmes]
just think! no matter where we’d go
they’d make the traffic stop

[mrs. draper & holmes]
we’d beat king solomon in all his glory
oh, everything would be just hunky+dory

[holmes]
if i became the president

[mrs. draper]
and i were the president’s wife
[mrs. draper & holmes]
we’d shake the hand of everyone we’d see

[holmes]
we could receive ambassadors

[mrs. draper]
the kind the upper class adores

[mrs. draper & holmes]
and have the whole supreme court down for tea

[holmes]
i’ll talk on trade conditions

[mrs. draper]
we’ll open expositions

[mrs. draper & holmes]
and proudly march behind the drum and fife

[mrs. draper]
oh, it thrills me just to tell of it

[holmes]
we both would be on vel+a+vit
if i became the president
[mrs. draper]
and i were the president’s wife

dear, any time that we’d need money
we’d call up the mint

[holmes]
i’d tell them that i must try out
the samples that they print

[mrs. draper]
would you cut down your drinking
when you’re with the ship of state?

[holmes]
i’d cut down on the water
and i’d take my whiskey straight

[mrs. draper]
you mustn’t chase around when you’re the prexy

[holmes]
it’s not my fault if women think i’m s+xy
if i became the president

[mrs. draper]
and i were the president’s wife
you’d flood the senate with your orat’ry
[holmes]
i’d make each politish+i+on
prohibit prohibish+i+on

[mrs. draper & holmes]
a hundred million drinkers would be free

[holmes]
i’d grow a beard, i’m thinkin’

[mrs. draper]
you’d be as great as lincoln
and mister hearst would surely print your life

[holmes]
but i’d never go so far afield
as tyler, polk, or gar+a+field
if i became the president

[mrs. draper]
and i were the president’s wife

if zanzibar grew tricky

[holmes]
or russia bolsheviky

[mrs. draper & holmes]
there’d be no braver man in all the strife

[holmes]
but i won’t become your pappy till
you get me in the cap+i+till
and i become the president

[mrs. draper]
and i am the president’s wife

- beth fowler charles goff lyrics

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