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bird and macdonald - world's dirtiest song lyrics

[verse]
there was an old farmer who lived by a rock
he sat in the meadow a+shaking his fist
at some boys who were down by the crick (creek)
their feet in the water, their hands on their marbles
and playthings, and in days of yore
there came a young lady she looked like a
pretty young creature. she sat on the grass
she pulled up her dresses and showed us her
ruffles and laces and white fluffy duck
she said she was learning a nеw way to
bring up her children and learn thеm to knit
while the boys in the barnyard where shoveling
refuse and litter from yesterdays hunt
while the girl in the meadow was rubbing her
eyes at the fellows as girls sometimes do
to make it quite clear that she wanted to
go for a nice pleasant stroll on the grass
then hurry back home for a nice piece of
ice cream and cake that stood three layers tall
and after dessert she was ready to
go for another walk down by the dock
with any young man with a sizable
roll of one hundreds and a big bulge up front
if he asked politely she would show him her
little pet dog who was subject to fits
and maybe she’d let him grab hold of her
small tenders hands with movement so quick
then she’d lean on over and suck on his
soda so sweetly till she finished it
then pull down her panties to rub on her
hip, which she bruised when she ran down the halls
’cause he tried to force her to l!ck on his
candy so tasty made of b+tterscotch
and then he spread whipped cream
all over her cookies she had been baking all night
if you think this is dirty you’re f+cking well right

- bird and macdonald lyrics

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