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bits of alan - dirty dishes lyrics

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[intro]

there was lots of clammy back [?] rhetoric and
all over the chalkboard wall of our still unfinished bas+m+nt

she made all the wrong words seem to rhyme just right, making cuddling a glacier seem a lot more cozy and far more safer than it ever looked on any paper
i think she wanted someone to save her

shе was trying not to k!ll herself
as if a self imposed lonely, a lipstick phony of a raincloud could ever know what it’s actually like in h+ll
it’s an artificial h+ll, her h+ll
it’s a dollar+store cancer diagnosis filled with styrofoam, pixie sticks, and the innocence of a restaurant hostess
i was hoping someone could save us

we were trying not to k!ll ourselves and you were wishing i would just k!ll everyone else
mother of mercy i was tempted
i imaged counting raindrops at all of my friends’ funerals
friends that only became friends after death, because only the worst of us romanticize the dead
jesus christ keep me warm
jesus christ there’s some stuff i don’t get
like how i know there’s no god
but i know h+ll is as real as real gets

[epic instrumental]
i knew i wouldn’t k!ll myself when i pictured the girl i thought about too much
she kept saying i had enough
she kept saying my beer was a crush
she knew i was overthinking my overreactions and instagram captions, and even the placement of those c+cktail napkins
i even ordered a glass of water but i couldn’t help but just let it be
i knew nothing was saving me



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