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blossom dearie - napoleon lyrics

napoleon’s a pastry
bismarck is a herring
alexander’s a crème de cocoa mixed with rum
and herbie hoover is a vacu+um
columbus is a circle, and a day off
pershing is a square, what a payoff
julius caesar is just a salad on a shelf
so, little brother, get wise to yourself
life’s a bowl of cherry pits, that’s the way it is
play it big and it throws you for a loop
comes today we’re great
comes tomorrow we’re tomato soup
napoleon’s a pastry
get this under your brow:
what once used to be a rooster
is just a duster now
dubarry is a lipstick
pompadour’s a hairdo
good queen mary just floats along from pier to pier;
venus de milo’s just a pink bra++iere
sir gladstone is a bag + ain’t it shocking
and the mighty kaiser’s just a stocking
czar of russia is now caviar
and cleopatra is a black cigar
yes my honey lamb, swift is just a ham
lincoln’s a tunnel, coolidge is a dam;
yes my n0ble lad, comes today we’re fads
comes tomorrow we’re subway ads
homer is a swa+at
get this under your brow:
all these big+wheel controversials are just commercials now
better get your jug of wine and loaf of bread before that final bow

- blossom dearie lyrics

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