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bob's burgers - i sure would like a mom lyrics

i sure would like a mom lyrics
[intro: tina, gene, courtney & linda]
gene, go on with your incredibly accurate accounting of what happened earlier tonight
i will
there i was, searching the universe for the staff of creation

ugh! why did i have to make the universe so huge? i can’t find anything. i want that staff. i wanna have someone like a mom
you mean like me?

wait, how’d you create her without the staff of creation?
i didn’t. she’s a vision
ooh, vision

but if i was real, here’s what i might be like

[verse 1: courtney & gene]
i’d live on a diet of winе and cheese
you teach me to say thank you. and also, plеase
manners are important, heh

[verse 2: courtney & gene]
if you don’t have a date i’ll go with you to the prom
oh, i sure would like to have someone like a mom
i’d do your homework when you don’t wanna
you’d let me get a big iguana
as long as you take care of it
[verse 3: courtney, gene & gene & courtney]
i’ll make you watch all my favorite rom+coms
oh, i sure would like to have someone like a mom
to be somebody’s mom

[interlude: courtney & gene]
mombo, you’re fading
because i’m not real
i’m just a vision (vision, vision)
i need that staff of creation!
you don’t need the staff. you just need to believe. if you believe, put your hand under your armpit and squeeze
it makes a funny sound
that’s the sound of believing
everyone, believe with me

+fart noise+

there was thunder and lightning and crashing cymbals. and steel drums, i wanna say. and mombo became real
and everyone was dancing on the ceiling and this way before lionel richie
i’m real. this is amazing. i’m so much better than a dad
what’s a dad?
oh, let me tell you about dads. they’re hairy, they’ve got no rhythm, they can’t tape a school play to save their lives, they smell weird, their knees are backwards…

[outro: bob & linda]
okay, gene, we get it
+hums+ oh, that’s catchy

- bobs burgers lyrics

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