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brentalfloss - dk rap 2018 lyrics

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here we, here we, here we go again!

so they’re finally back, it’s been a long time
they’re bringing you a brand new rhyme
you loved them all in dk 64
and i bet you’re wonderin’ where are they now?
huh! dk! donkey kong!

he’s the leader of the bunch, you know his name
but behind the scenes, he’s not the same
after dk 64, he got into guns
now he hunts endangered species just for fun
but his coconut gun still fires in spurts
if he shoots you, you’ll probably die

he’s older, meaner, and wealthier too
he’s the first member of the dk crew
huh! dk! he loves guns!

tiny kong’s back, so listen up, dudes
she can shrink in size to suit her mood
now you may have heard that the bees are dying
well, the truth about tiny is horrifying!

she’s k!lling all the bees!
she’s k!lling all the bees!
we don’t know why, but she’s k!lling all the bees
she can float through the air and climb up trees
but tiny kong’s a murderer of bees!
dk! goodbye bees

he has a funny face, his limbs are long
but lanky never felt like he belonged
he earned a degree in a college town
and decided to work as a s-x ed clown
now he has a p-n-s puppet and a v-lv- puppet too
and he’ll give a creepy lecture just for you
huh! dk!
(just for you)

and next up, diddy kong hits the stage
just like gary coleman, he does not age
his face is youthful like peter pan’s
but he’s a bitter old b-st-rd who hates his fans
he’s angry! h-rny! libido’s wild!
but women won’t date him ’cause he looks like a child
that might explain his job which you won’t forget
he blogs for diddypepetrumpmra.net
huh! dk! he needs love!

and then there’s chunky
he’s dead

huh!
dk! chunky’s dead!
dk! now the song is over!

come on, cranky! take me to the fridge!
cranky? aw man, cranky’s dead too!
cranky’s in the fridge!
oh, oh no!
wow! that’s terrible!

- brentalfloss lyrics

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