brian regan - you too & stuff lyrics
announcer: ladies and gentlemen, brian regan!: cheering:
brian: alright, how ya doin’ folks?: feedback:
it’s like you’re al sittin’ there, “hey pal, you got some jokes?”: laughing:
“why don’t you start crankin’ ’em out, circus boy?: laughing:
it’s good to be here
just tryin’ to go through life without looking stupid…: laughing:
it’s not workin’ out too well…: laughing:
sometimes you’ll say the wrong thing at the right time and feel stupid
somethin’ like, “you tow!”: laughing:
i was gettin’ out of a cab at the airport and the ddriver goes, “hey have a nice flight!”
“you tow!”: laughing:
“you too, you have a nice flight too, in case you ever fly someday.”: laughing:
“don’t even look at me, i’m a moron.”: laughing:
don’t know when to say the “you too” phrase.: laughing:
can’t handle it.: laughing:
i never learn, you know. a waitress will bring my meal. “hey, enjoy your meal.”
“you tow!”: laughing:
“but you don’t have one, do ya? i’m a dufus!”: laughing:
“if you do eat, enjoy it when you eat it if you have a break or something, later!”: laughing:
“if you get an opportunity, that’s all i’m tryin’ to say!”: laughing:
“that’s all that i’m drivin’ at, really! if you think about it…”: laughing:
“…that’s all.”: laugihng:
you ever start to say somethin’ and in the middle of what you’re sayin’ you decide to say somethin’ else, completely?: laughing:
you know, there’s already words out there.: laughing:
these friends were leaving the other day and i started to say, “hey, take care!” and i decided to say “good luck!” instead like halfway through, you know.: laughing:
so it came out neither, “see you later, brian!”
“take… luck!”: laughing:
“take luck and care… take… care of the luck. good luck take care of the… the luck that you might have.”: laughing:
“if you have luck, take it, care for it. take luck care of it… when you take luck care of…”: brian shouting gibberish:: laughing:
be sure you’re seein’ them again…: laughing:
“so how do you know that guy back ther, huh?”: laughing:
i’m always puttin’ my foot in my mouth
i don’t stop to think, you know, “oh no, words are coming out! oh no!”: laughing:
“i’m not thinkin’ of what i said!”: laughing:
like i met this woman recently, i could’ve sworn she was pregnant. let me tell ya.: crowd “aw”s:
i know now…: laughing:
i think the rule is, “don’t guess at that, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever…”: laughing:
somethin’ like that. when you have enough “evers” memorized, you know?
so i say, “hey, when’s that ba-by due?!”
you ever feel a word coming out but it’s to late to stop it?: laughing:
it’s… it’s comin’ out and loud, “oh hey when’s that ba-by due?! baby?!”: laughing:
“what baby?”: weird authentic brian regan sounds:: laughing:
“at the zoo! that… the pandas!”: laughing:
“the neigbors are tryin’ to have one, you know. thought we’d talk about. talk about the… fluffy zoo animals. i hear they get them over there, you can… you know, look at ’em…”: laughing:
“if you want… touch ’em…”: laughing:
have you ever guessed somebody’s gender wrong? ’cause no recoverin’ from that!”: laughing:
you just gotta move on ’cause you ain’t wrigglin’ outta nothin’, ya know?: laughing:
“hey uh, excuse me sir?”
“ma’am!”
“ok!”: laughing:
“ok, bye! bye human!”: laughing:
“bye, person!
nice to mmet you, individual!”: laughing:
i can’t remeber names…
and i’m always tryin’ to do the nickname thing to get out of it, everybody knows what you’re tryin’ to pull, you know?
“hey… buckaroo?…”: laughing:
“my name’s not buckaroo.”
“sure, sure it is, pardner?…”: laughing:
some people get really upset if you get their names wrong
especially is they have a name that’s similar to another name
carolin and caroline
they got a thing about that, man
don’t get that wrong, ’cause they’re gonna drill ya!: laughing:
“hey carol… in?”
“it’s caroline. it’s caroline brian…”: laughing:
“it’s brion!”: laughing:
“yes, my name is brion! it’s very hard to say my name correctly!”: laughing:
“cause my name is brionnga!”: laughing:
can you say that? very few can…
correctly.: laughing:
end
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