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brooke maxwell & jacob richmond - swingin' space age bachelor man lyrics

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ricky:
you might see before you
an ordinary man
an earthly illusion
all a part of the cosmic plan

yes, long ago, they visited
those others from outer sp+ce
informed me i’m the chosen one
to save the zolarian race!

it’s true. listen…

mischa & noel (as aliens):
ricky, we are a distant galaxy
a galaxy greatly in need
of your groove, you kink+o+matic powers
yes we need your freak–tastic seed

ricky:
they took me then, to their daughters realm
the land of the kitty cat star
i know you’ve heard the legends of

ricky and choir:
the s+xy cat women from zolar!
(cat noises)

constance/jane/ocean:
meow
meow

constance (s+xy pleading):
make love to me, ricky

ricky:
what?

constance/jane/ocean:
meow
meow

ricky:
okay

ocean:
but there’s one more small thing. won’t you please help our galaxy+

constance and ocean:
ricky?

ricky:
sure
ricky:
what would you do in my place?
a mere mortal man?
with the fate of a galaxy before you
millions of lives in your hand?!

the naughty daughters of the realm
all hungry for my chi
you’d never guess the role i played
in zolarian history!

i’m just a swingin’…
sp+ce age…
bachelor man

let’s dance, kitties

(during the dance ricky and cat women from zolar go behind the curtain. music is a kinky dance romp, 16 bars long, with ping ponging “meows,” growing in intensity)

tracked ricky (tracked constance, jane, ocean):
(meow)
meow
(meow)
meow
(meow)
meow
(meow)
meow
(meow)
meow
(meow)
meow
(meow)
tracked foursome:
meow meow meow meow meow

ricky:
it gets weird now

mischa, noel (as aliens):
ricky, you’ve lain withour daughters
you’re our hero, our saving grace
but now there is a new challenge
for zolaria to face…

(curtain rises, revealing ricky in an amazing sp+ce outfit circa 1970’s david bowie.)

ricky:
for they’re at war with k+9
count dog+u+lous, that son of a b+tch!

choir (except jane):
that son of a b+tch!

ricky:
the generals are all standing by

ricky and choir (except jane):
tell us ricky, should we pull the switch?

constance/jane/ocean:
meow
meow

ricky:
oh my goodness, what have i gotten myself into?!

constance/ocean:
meow
meow

ricky:
i mean, why are they asking me, i’m a lover not a fighter… i thought i told them…

i’m just a swingin’…
sp+ce age…
bachelor man

and so i told them…

i am just a man
a sp+ce age man, that’s all i am
but i wanna hold your hand
all your hands while we make love tonight oh

i have no desire to rule the galaxy
oh to hold you close
is enough for me
making love in zero gravity+y+y+ya+ooooo
(riffs)

choir (repeating):
makin’ love
makin’ love
makin’ love
oh just love zolar!

ricky (ad libbing):
you’re my catnip you’re the most…
you’re such a pretty, gritty kitty
i wanna be, your scra+hatchin’ post
let me be, let me be, let me be…!

and they listened. and they heard my message, for i was singing notes that only cats or cat people could hear. a g#, 5 octaves above middle c

(music stops, ricky sucks in the helium from the balloon…releasing a high note. pause, cats react. one cat sprays itself with a bottle of hairspray.)

incredible. peace was restored. i guess that’s what happens…

when you’re a swingin’…
sp+ce age…
bachelor man

so i came back to earth
to show you the way
to lead you pretty people
to a brighter day

we can save the whole galaxy
with love from the heart!
and s+xy cat ladies is where we gotta start!

yes, i came back to this rock!
with my love and my seed!
ladies, you got what i want!
and you know i’ve got what you need!

cause i’m a swinging!
sp+ce age!
ba+ba+ba+ba+bachelor man!

tracked choir:
meow



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