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bs de résistance - the eagle and the bear lyrics

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woke up to the radio and i knew something was wrong
my country music station was playin’ a mexican song
i looked around but couldn’t find my bright red maga hat
just a pink knit cap with ears that made me look like a p-ssy cat

looked outside my window and i almost had to gag
they’d taken down old glory, and put up a rainbow flag
my good ol’ pickup truck was gone, replaced by a hybrid car
and the only radio station that it got was npr

they said there’s nukular missiles comin’ from north korea
and all the christian churches are switchin’ to sharia
but then a man said somethin’
’bout made my heart stop pumpin’
the president’s name was hillary!

there’s been a yuuuge mistake
no doubt about it
no way that the usa
could’ve ever allowed it

how did our n0ble country
let that crooked witch bamboozle ’em?
it must have been the illegals
just like the kenyan mooslim

i fell down on my knees
and offered up a prayer
then i saw a mighty vision
appearing in mid-air

three smilin’ men looked down on me
and said “buddy, dry your eyes”
it was putin, trump and jesus
all three were super-sized

jesus grinned at me and said
“the time for tears is done
thanks to vlad and donald
the healing has begun

the eagle and the bear
make such a perfect pair
the eagle and the bear
have saved us from despair!”

i said “lord, you’re darn tootin’!
and thank you, mr. putin!
if it takes the man from moscow
to put hillary in the hoosegow
then sure as shootin’, i don’t care!”

the eagle and the bear
got a great big world to share
the eagle and the bear
because they truly care

they’ll fix up any crisis
they’ll drop a nuke on isis
they’re the answer to all our prayers
god bless the eagle
god bless the eagle
god bless the eagle
and the bear!

- bs de resistance lyrics

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