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celestrai - mycologist’s game lyrics

taken over, but kept covered
a close+kept parasite

intertwined, yet
long since un+beloved
past + yet your spores still root with spite

razed myself
to earn your love
hurt replaced
all that i was

the+the+the
rot behind my ears is whispering my name
i would rather it be quiet
it reminds me of the shame
the shame of giving you my heart
a choice so insane
that discovеring the origin’s left to be
mycologist’s game

mycеlium converges + maybe i need help
when the layers coalesce + no i’ll never tell
a parasite embedded + i’m not doing well
i can’t begin to salvage + what’s left of “myself”
under my skin (mycelium converges + maybe i need help)
memories will still sprout (when the layers coalesce + no i’ll never tell)
deep and within (a parasite embedded + i’m not doing well)
i can’t dig them out (i can’t begin to salvage + what’s left of “myself”)

subsumed and consumed in whole (mycelium converges + maybe i need help)
my body broken down (when the layers coalesce + no i’ll never tell)
(a parasite embedded + i’m not doing well
(i can’t begin to salvage + what’s left of “myself”)

after all…

oh, a
beating in my chest is drowning out my name
i can’t remember the quiet
from before my broken shame
in my slowly supplanted heart
no part is the same
no mortician could identify whats left for a
mycologist

the+the+the
separation’s gone between me and the pain
i became all that you made me be
to carry your blame
giving you my everything
ended all the same:
every part of my biology replaced with mycology
rotted to the bone and mycelium veins
there’s n0body left to help me
pushed them all out for shame
you avert your gaze
cultivar in your wake
recovering what is left of me + has to be
mycologist’s game

- celestrai lyrics

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