chamz - addiction (feat. x1x) lyrics
my life filled with addiction
it’s got a hold on me
and moves with precision
from drugs to s+x
quick when switching positions
from coffee to cigarettes
i can’t get away, can’t seem to find any distance
why fight it
there’s no resistance
required help so i asked for assistance
substituted one device for another
confused and complicit in my divisions
smile but sad
happy but mad
sane but mad
this war is no blitzkrieg
meaning it will not be won swiftly
it’s long and hard and i’m tested
and my strength sometimes gets weary
cursed with some kind of strange and rare abnormality
my way of thinking is complex chemically
my brain pattern sending off different signals drastically
wanting what i don’t need
needing what i don’t want
endorphins, dopamine, serotonin
these substitute chemicals that i’m cloning
these emotions of self+loathing
don’t lose your grip, i tell myself
so i stay holding
this deception that i am fighting
is instant gratification
and there’s no controlling
should i leave it into god’s hands and let it go
repeating the serenity prayer over and over again
i need the courage to accept the things i cannot change
patience, awareness
i’m not opposing
acknowledging knowledge of self
focus, while cautious
like a police officer patrolling
i just gotta have it
this sh+t like magic
i told my mama f+ck rehab
i gotta have it (yeah)
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