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cherokee graves - itsnotaphasethisistherealme lyrics

[intro]
the difference between depression and sadness;
is sadness is just y’know from happenstance
whatever happened or didn’t happen for you or y’know grief or whatever it is
and depression is your body saying f-ck you, i don’t want to be this character anymore

[verse]
lonely and depressed and i still haven’t said it
can’t find the words i can put in a sentence
i want satisfaction
i want your acceptance
and i’m hurt so bad (hurt so bad)

sorry i’m mad
using my will and i wanted it back (and i wanted it back)
i’m taking it out on the ones that had nothing to do with it
it’s in the bag so i can’t bring it back
no longer alive (alive)
why can’t you look at me in the eye (look at me right in the eye)
keep the smoking so you don’t have to try (try)
hating myself on so many nights
i don’t think i’m the same (same)
i’m everything vague (vague)
now i just hide and stay where it’s safe
i don’t want to be seen
i won’t come out to play
if there’s nothing to win
and you said it’s a race (and you said it’s a race)

but i don’t want to let go
you were crying in my bed when i get home
put it down so warm in the red glow
goodbye to the things i won’t say
and things i kept so deep
what a relief
doesn’t how much but it’s letting me sleep
yo it’s cutting me open and letting me bleed
yo it’s k!lling me slowly and giving me grief

how am i supposed to go on?
can only say i’m this sad for so long
why did they say it was an unknown cause
yeah right
okay, tell me what can go wrong?

if i’m going to h-ll, i guess i’m going to h-ll
no one can save me, i’ll burn by myself
i don’t think i can love like the way i felt
yo, i’m sick of my heart in the way that it melts
i feel so numb (wanna feel none)
i just crawl under the rock i’m from
with my foot in my mouth, bite my cheek and tongue
i want in on the joke, i want in on the fun

but to cry me a river and drown
why is it feeling so meaningless now?
and you have every reason to doubt me
i’m letting you down and i’m sinking and drowning
(keep changing the beat)
life is a dream
is it really that hard to believe?
nothing set in the stone
we can want different things
when we grow up we don’t know what we want to be
yo i’m fine where i am
don’t want to pretend
does it get any better, asking for a friend?

get bricks in advance
nothing to say
no, not a word, i’m left out to decay

now i’m as sad as they come
know what i want, what i’m capable of
wanna learn how to love
but i’m addicted, it’s never enough

[outro]
[?]

- cherokee graves lyrics

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