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chillinit x huskii x flowz - dust 2 dust lyrics

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[flowz dilione]
i was running from this sh-tty place, where the the sun sets west of the city scape
i slept in a bed that was never made, and used to dream about food on my dinner plate

no heater when the winter came, so cold, blood wouldn’t spill when i’d slit my veins
that was life and didn’t change for 19 years in my mind i was in a maze
i was trapped and i couldn’t see a future, only all these things that i wouldn’t be, i took a gamble and paid the price like a bookies fee
it’s hard to stay straight and narrow in these crooked streets

i used to chill with this one chick, she had a big heart but her dad was a f-ckwit
me and her lived together in her mums crib, a halfway house cause her mother was a junkie
i was 15 and living on her couch, grace if you can hear me then i’m thinking of you now
and you’re probably wondering why i’m not around after everything we went through i don’t wanna let you down

[chillinit]
growing up i couldn’t wait to be a dad
i was chillin’ with my brothers while i’m blazing through a bag
think about everything that you do that’s gone make me mad (ah)
cos’ you’ll be just like your dad

i was only 23 and your mother was 21
and we was never meant to have a son
from the moment you was born you knew that i’d show you love
maybe that this baby’s a blessing from up above

we was in a bit of a jam
cos your daddy couldn’t never keep his d-ck in his pants
cos your daddy he’s a pr-ck of a man
told your mother that he love her
f-ckin’ b-tches with a spliff in his hand

trust me daddy put it work
daddy bit his fingers to the bone till it hurt
tell em daddy put you first
daddy put emotions to the side while he grind
tell ’em daddy did his dirt
till your daddy went berserk

[flowz dilione]
do you remember when she broke my heart, when i came to yours in the morning i was soaked in blood
i climbed through your window to your open arms, you packed me up a cone and you told me that you know it’s hard

i’ll keep you in my heart til my last breath, you’ve been there from the start you’re my last chance
and i hate that your face is the past tense, hate even more in the present that we are friends
but i’ll always have your back, cause you’re the only one who said i falled into a trap
you told me that i more than just collapsed, but i stayed in your room and kept ignoring all the facts

but a lesson learnt is an answer earned, sometimes the question hurts so be careful first
i left school at an early age, with the hopes of a job and to earn a wage

[chillinit]
mummy hates daddy cos he flirts
girls perfume she can smell it on the shirt
but for some reason mummy say daddy is the world
while your daddy’s out getting called daddy by the girls

started getting evil to the sound
how the f-cks it gonna work
how we gon’ raise this child
how the f-ck we ever gon’ keep our feet up on the ground
how we gon’ see the light when there be demons all around?

mumma started feeling like dad
and now i’m thinking that you’re better not had
now i’m thinkin’ our opinion is you’re better off dead (arghh)
i’ve got things that are better not said

2 days p-ss without a second of time
we flatline, goodbye yo’ we ended your life
and a part of me blames her, mostly i blame me
you’ll never get to know about a future that may be

will never get to see you walk your first stack
will never get to hear you talk your first rap
i’m so sorry that you never had the chance
and you never got the voice
never got your second glance
never got your first kiss
never got your first dance (argh)
all because your daddy ain’t a man

and nowadays i’ve been crying like a lot
but i’m tryna keep it in
tryna hide it from my pops
till i’m loading up a gun
maybe firin’ i shot
till i’m lying on the ground
left dying on the block (argh)

but in a way now i’m riding to the top
am i supposed to thank god for the life you never got?

it’s got me f-cked up
it’s got me f-cked up
it’s got me f-cked up
(always f-cked up)

[flowz dilione]
mum packed her stuff and she moved away, i had to figure out to close the book you have to turn the page
but my job didn’t work out, and then i stopped looking cause i knew i’d get turned down
i was over waiting and my motivation was gone, all i wanted was to make her proud
the years to follow were my hardest, i went through a lot of sh-t, been swallowed by the darkness

but i came out the other end, with the knowledge of a man who’s died a hundred deaths
through it all i’m only left with a couple friends, but they’re my fam and will remain until the f-ckin’ end
(my fam, the f-ckin end)

[huskii]
i wanna k!ll somebody
but myself the one i’m k!llin’ lately
i never loved n0body till i met my little baby
still you hate me
still you take him
still you rape me over text with some pics of him and a dude you dating

moved away when i asked you said you ain’t talk to me

we’ve got a kid together hows this b-tch ignoring me?
her family f-cked if i come to the door they reporting me
its haunting me to know that my son might think i ain’t wanted him

late in the day in the day i’m awake and in pain shivering
isolated tryna escape cos i hate fitting in
blame it on the way i was raised and my brain sizing
maybe from the a2 pills and these 8 ritalin

she knows i fight for the death just to see my son
i know that she hates me she’s angry at what i done
i’d give her sp-ce let her move on and try be a mum

and she says i’ll never see him and disappears on the run

i know she needs my help i’d f-cking need it to
were new to this sh-t she doesn’t see what she needs to do
work with me i’m here for him
i ain’t leaving you
i keep wondering why you run like i’m beefing you

aha, never thought i’d be a dad
out here doing [?] to get a bag
then i met your mother
she changed me and showed me things i never had
made me think maybe i wasn’t just like my dad

i was 18 your mummy was still in school
used to think that all the dumb sh-t i done was cool
i used to use the way she looked at me as my fuel
got me through a lot without her i was acting like a fool

but i don’t know what happened to us
mummy started hating dad for the racket he does
mummy started hating visions of daddy with sl-ts
and told me she was pregnant
daddy got put back in the cuffs

now mummy’s at the back of the bus
tryna visit me in prison dropping bags of the buds
now shes taking daddy’s pills tryna manage his stuff
i can’t forgive myself for all the damage daddy has done

i tried to turn my back on this life
few months went by but we ain’t have nothin’ nice
i see myself every time i stare in the whites of your eyes
and all the things i never had your daddy has to provide

so daddy’s trapping for nappies and wipes
you getting stabbed, your selling packets for addies and nikes
i swear this life was nothing that your daddies was like
mummy doesn’t see my side she thinks i’m trapped in this life

- chillinit x huskii x flowz lyrics

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