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christmas queens - interlude 3 lyrics

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[kids]
wow! that really cheered me up
or maybe its just these rum b-lls, mmm

[jackie beat as grandma]
give me those you little monster!
feeling better thanks to the song
the drag queens decided to take matters into their own hands
and pushed the bus to the closest service station
about a mile up the road

[kids]
they pushed the bus!?

[jackie beat as grandma]
yes, you do realize that drag queens are men, right? anyhow
when they finally got to the service station they got some bad news from billy bob
the stereotypically stupid inbred white-trash auto-mechanic
ironically played by an african american drag queen
(we’re really pushing the envelope here people)

[bob the drag queen as billy bob]
sorry to tell ya’ll this
but looks like you little ladies are leaking tranny fluid

[jiggly caliente]
i’m offended

[katya zamolodchikova]
i’m triggered!

[manila luzon]
micro-aggression

[bob the drag queen as billy bob]
well, i ain’t sure of none of that means
on the count of the fact that i dropped outta school
in third grade like my mom and dad and my first cousin
y’all are gonna need a new transmission

[alaska thunderf-ck]
oh well, go ahead and stick it in

[bob the drag queen as billy bob]
well i wish it was that easy

[manila luzon]
would it help if i put this bag over her face?

[bob the drag queen as billy bob]
wh-what i mean is, i’m gonna have to order the part
and it won’t be here ’til tomorrow

[katya zamolodchikova]
d-mn! that stinks worse than the crotch of trixie mattel’s pantyhose

[jiggly caliente]
that’s okay girls, you know what?
we deserve some time off
and we’ll make it to our next show in plenty of time
in the meantime, i’m going to take this opportunity
to rehe-rs- my new song

[manila luzon]
wait, you… rehe-rs-?

[alaska thunderf-ck]
oh god! she’s not going to sing, is she?

- christmas queens lyrics

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