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chyde - speaking my silence lyrics

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they all wanna talk about me like they know some sh-t
well if you all about me why don’t you tell them this
if you really know some sh-t, tell me why i’m bleeding
why i’m screaming in my dreams, and wake up trying to breathe and

hyperventilating, sweating down the sheets, dying to make it
trying to take it alive and awake
believing in everything i am and ever been man i’m reading
like a fortuneteller, spelling it out, with my pencil, my spells are speaking

the bells are ringing, causion, speaking my silence, h-ll is singing
rising my highness for it – the lion ascendent
they call me chyde, i shall be defined by my condemnent
this is my life, i fight for my survival, and my right to defend it

tell them about this then
tell them i much i’m missing, tell them how much i’m remeniscing
tell them how much i’m hurting for not seeing my father?
tell them how much i’m searching for a reason to call her

tell them how much perfection i want and how i cannot be bothered
with any less of an effort than the absolute best of what you got
i’m never gonna stop, tell them how i’m working
tell them how hot she was, but it f-cking wasn’t worth it

tell them how many times i’ve wanted to k!ll myself
the thought of the knife, slizing my wrists, or should i pop pills instead
jump of a cliff or put a rope around my neck
brompton c-cktail or maybe just blow the brains out of my head?

tell them how much i miss my family and hate what had to be
tell them how much i always gave all of what i had in me
tell them how much it’s taken for me to be fake and formal
when all i really wanted was a place to be home that’s normal

my brother just died, but i’ve lost brothers in plural
friends who turned their back around in disguise of being loyal
so f-ck you and your sorrys and your lies aka. morals
i live like i’m gonna die, knowing inside i’m immortal

tell them the pain is right inside my core
tell them this is why i’m treating life like it’s war
so when you ask me why and i don’t tell you what for
know i don’t got time to f-ck around with those who don’t provide me with more

chorus:
so if you’re you’re gonna talk about me tell the truth
i walk my talk, you talk my talk, so what that says about you?
only god can judge you, come judge me, come define this
come to find, my mind is my weapon i’m speaking my silence
x2

outro:
they all wanna talk about me like they know some sh-t
well if you all about me why don’t you tell them this
why don’t you tell them this…
speaking my silence

- chyde lyrics

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