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classy whale - the confusing northeast corridor song lyrics

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[intro]
on may 1st, 1971, the national passenger rail corporation, better known as amtrak, took over penn central’s passenger operations on the northeast corridor between boston and washington dc
for a while, instead of calling these trains by a common name, say, the northeast regional, it kept its predecessor’s tradition of giving a different name to pretty much every train and schedule variant
and then, just as you finally memorize the timetable, it kept changing those namеs
what were those trains callеd? well, here are just a few, from over the years

[verse]
between dc and nyc
there’s betsy ross and the bowery
chesapeake, well there were three
the capitol, and embassy
free state, georgetown, herald square
president will get you there
nightcap helps you get some rest
but metroliner’s speed is best

murray hill and capitol hill
and beacon hill and bunker hill
ride the representative
or sleeper that’s executive
clockers leaving from philly
every hour to nyc
motive power from njt
all named in the late 70s
there’s edison and garden state
big apple and keystone (wait!)
quaker city, william penn
and the philadelphian
from harrisburg you could hop on
the valley forge up to boston
but when you’d catch it isn’t clear
the route kept changing year to year
two clamdiggers now deceased
these guys became shore line east
different hours congressional
and boston’s bicentennial
springfield bankers that was great
the same route had the nutmeg state
new yorkers rode on the wall street
and fast mail had just one amfleet

richmond gets the old dominion
the tidewater, and virginian
shoreliner used lrcs
and east wind spanned the nec
pilgrim, schuylk!ll, minuteman
bay state took a route inland
senator ran all the way
and night owl crashed in west back bay
turbos ran the first few years
but kept on hurting people’s ears
trains were named for washington, john adams, and jefferson
some routes were a little odder, like acs, and cape codder
federal would let you sleep, and penn line was the chesapeake
[bridge]
northeastdirect in ’95
kept names a few more years alive
then the branding change that happened next
left many riders real perplexed

[spoken]
so my tickets on the acela, but i don’t know if it’s the acela express, or the acela regional… or there’s an acela commuter too? help!

[verse]
aboard the corridor today
amtrak has found a simpler way
most trains are painted with the same
boring but familiar name
so do you think that it appears
that just one name makes things more clear
or does it take away the fun
to go from all those names to one?
(phew!)
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