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claydoh - amelia lyrics

[intro]:
hol’ up
hol’ up
h+llo?…
(beep)

“testing…”

verse:
i can feel the distance through those 3 letter responses to my sincerest emotions
everybody wants the fun but
i just want the one
i can bring around my mom
and not feel like i’m rushing sh+t after taking a minute
to just reflect on the party life that i had chose to live
all the highs that i experienced was it worth it?
i knew that i was frying, barely crying held sh+t in
but now i know that i do not identify with it
cause i accused you of denial when i was the one
projecting all emotions on to you just like the sun
and when your moon comes i project it into bars
that you don’t even listen to, but got fans in your house and sh+t
and i’ll still be around
long after you guys split
not praying for it but i’m just asking you
is it him?
not saying that it’s me cause if you’re out his door like that
then who’s to say that i won’t be next, leave it at that
but anyways i sent you an invite i hope you got it
because i threw this party 4 u to come through and see it
i finally understand to keep my enemies at claws length
you’re forever in my mind
so i’d figure hop inside
for the one time been a minute since i hit you up
i figured i should cause, i’m finally blowing up
i used to be so bitter bout the way you’d clown my bars
but now i know that i was codependent on your thoughts
but how’ve you been?
i see you’re in somebody else’s arms
not bitter i’m just asking cause
i just wanna talk to you
play catch up for a minute as my passenger
scratch the left door on my back seat
last week
and figured that i’d call cause it reminded me of our accident
back in 2021 when i was at my parents’ place
back when you would take me to the parties like i was your date
fabricated sh+t instead of actually going out on dates
and now i’m hosting one and i don’t know if i should send
this letter of a text to you eruptions in my head
all the fans i’m gaining cause i ended connection
i still wanna reach out cause i don’t like how we ended
and i still get defensive on occasion when my cousins ask my status on relationships i tell them that “i haven’t met the one” they look at me crazy
like clearly they don’t get that i’m pushing forth the art i’m making
and the last time i was with someone i wrote a real love song…
and i meant it so sincerely yet she still hated on it
but i take responsibility for rushing in too quick
but this party is a banger
hopefully you can make it…
[outro]:
“stop it now! i mean it!…

- claydoh lyrics

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