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cohen (band) - nothing lyrics

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as long as i’ve been fighting this disease
there’s been an internalized dichotomy
between whether to surrender
my self+integrity and ask for help
or keep diluting my issues
and try to medicate myself

my disorder hates the fatigue of over+exertion
my dependency hates
the inconsistencies of purging
but both love what they do for me
and as always
it’s no surprise
i’ve become attached so easily

hand in hand
bodies interlocked
contouring inebriated smiles
aimed to deter the moonlit vile thoughts

flirting with the notion of a better image
this is where push comes to shove
no two vices more in sync+
poster children of a perfect love
(of a perfect love)

i’ve been sobered
reflecting on myself
with the help of my reflection
each blink, a snapshot
cataloging lack of progress
adding to the collection

i’m disgusted with myself
every time i’m forced to eat
it repeats night and day
i can’t seem to f+cking lose weight
and if i did
it probably won’t stay that way
so i try to save face
minimize my intake

pseudo+poetic
drunk on the carpet
with compulsive intent
to blackout every mistake
every mirror+fed target
every passing glance at glass
yields a roll of the dice
what is the goal this week?
is it three pounds, or will two suffice?
my vices don’t know each other by name
but share an unspoken chemistry

i don’t want to have to reassure myself
it’s not necessary
to weigh myself every f+cking hour
but as i carry through the year
it’s becoming blatantly clear
the scale has bled me clean of power

“if you lose anymore weight
you’ll be nothing”

i wish you could see
that’s the sweetest dream
i’ve had since i was seventeen

- cohen band lyrics

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