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collegehumor - 31 words that sound like slurs but aren't lyrics

there’s many words that sound like slurs
but aren’t in fact, you see
so don’t dismay at what you say
they’re perfectly pc

why, you can mention ch+nks if they’re in your armor
speak if “spick” if you say, “and span”
spook a crow if you’re a farmer
have a nip of kraut from the hot dog man

(i still don’t think that you should be saying these words)
(ah, but within the context, they’re perfectly innocent)
(but that’s not what people think when they hear them)
(well, that’s okay, zach ++ you just have to explain yourself every single time you use them.)
(did you write this song just so you could say these words?)
plug a dyk+ if you mean a dam
bum a f+g ++ why thank you, ma’am!
a carabinger used for climeys
don’t look now but something’s limey

(what the f+ck?!)

these chips of citrus fame
i eat them at the redskins game
(that name’s not cool, guys! what the h+ll?!)
it’s sanctioned by the nfl

(i haven’t heard that song in a coon’s age)
(whoa, whoa, you definitely can’t say that word)
(no, it actually comes from an ancient folk legend that says that raccoons are very long+lived. a history of racial intolerance is the only thing that stands between you and saying, “coon” as much as you want.)
(as long as you mean the animal!)
(i’m just not gonna say it at all)

say there, caldwell, why do you sn+gger?
i sn+gger from all the n+ggling chiggers
the sn+gger was triggered by n+ggling chiggers?
indeed it was, now my sn+ggers grow bigger
sounds like you need a drink. take a swig from this jigger
(ha ha ha, don’t mind if i do)

(we’ve received complaints from all of your coworkers. now, i know the words you’re saying aren’t technically slurs, but they’re making everyone uncomfortable)
(ah, but that’s the trick of it. you see, every word can make you uncomfortable if you say it in the right tone)
(it doesn’t even have to be a real word!)
like jeffer and stiz and krunt and goobo
fike and snozz and f+cking choobos
bluehead, redback, tingum, and tango
garglers, gringlers, plumpers and++++(bleep)+

(oh, that was a real one!)

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