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concrete cee - still searching lyrics

[verse 1]
born alone, live alone, die alone
call my old friends but, only hear the dial tone
grab my keys and leave, at least the streets
will greet me with open arms –
as i walk, zonin’ out, my soul is calmed
going past spots that i used to frequent when i was a teen
by myself with my goals and dreams, visualizing
what my so-called friends never seem to believe
they flock towards those that already achieved
fairweather types i don’t really need in my life
so i put a check mark behind their names
just in case i came to fame, i would know why they think i changed
plain to see they don’t really know about my pain
and don’t want to, good, i’ll bother you no more
i put a road block on memory lane, just for safety
so i ain’t going back there next time you face me…

[chorus]
did you ever feel home on the road?
would you rather play home than away?
you see, i struck while the iron was cold
but that didn’t make a duller blade
who can truly say they know it all
when most barely even know their place?
you see, i only know how far i’ve gone
but i could never say that i know my way

[verse 2]
goin’ to sleep when the last thoughts hit the dreamcatcher
need a valve to release pressure
retreat to the alcove like seven of nine
because my rational mind can never recline
see, the lies that we lived, now are truths we believe
which is why truth hurts, we are used to deceit
in our quest for love, we fall blindly
for what minds imagine but eyes can’t see
i went without hugs for weeks, went without a kiss for years
after a while, desire disappears
i look at pain like i stare through it
like a wall of eyes, i just tear through it
i don’t feel pride for accomplishments
feeling unperturbed by criticism or compliments
letting go of the baggage, that’s all it is
left it at the crossroad and only thought “good riddance”

[chorus]

[verse 3]
weird feeling when you can’t recognize
the city you’ve been born in, and years hung a veil
over things people remember you for, having seen so much
you don’t mind forgetting the bad parts
but hate when you recall them, the ones that got away
and the ones that you thought would be there always
everybody on their own grind, journeys turn lonesome
who never had his heart broken, probably never owned one
look and sound so old and still so young
learning to appreciate the moments that are golden
love talking to children and listen to their dreams
unenc-mbered by the greed that adults keep feeding them
along with their hatreds related to race
faith and gender, we still gotta share the same sp-ce
in our chase for the papes, we haste towards graves
justifying what we take with what little we gave…

[chorus]

i’m still searching…

- concrete cee lyrics

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