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crazy ex-girlfriend cast – the math of love triangles lyrics

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[rebecca]
what’s a girl to do when she’s stuck between men
it’s like she’s a barbie with two perfect kens
but wait, it just occurred to me
maybe i can solve this with geometry
yes, smarts can help this sitchywation untangle
so professors: teach me
the math of love triangles
(spoken)
yay, time for book facts!

[teachers]
a triangle is a polygon
with three edges and three vertices
take the base times the height, cut that in half
to find the area of the surfaces

[rebecca]
uh-huh, i wasn’t really listening, but i can see
the center of the triangle is lil’ ol’ me!

the math of love triangles
isn’t hard to learn

[teachers]
you’re not taking in what we’re saying
we’re a little bit concerned

[rebecca]
yes, the math of love triangles
is as simple as can be
whichever tom or d-ck i might pick
the center of the triangle is lil’ ol’ me!

[teachers]
actually a triangle has multiple centers

this triangle’s scalene

[rebecca]
that’s astute
so i need to decide which man’s more acute

[teachers]
here’s pythagoras’ theorem

[rebecca]
will this help me choose?
if not i’ll be swinging from a hypote-noose

[teachers]
let’s take a look at what this line bisects

[rebecca]
is that spelled b-i-s-e-x?

[teachers]
those are good puns but please pay attention

[rebecca]
oh no, professors, am i facing suspension?
whee, a swing! it’s literal suspension!

the math of love triangles
isn’t hard to learn

[teachers]
we’re starting to suspect
you don’t sincerely want to know about triangles

[rebecca]
yes, the math of love triangles
is as simple as can be
i need to choose between men, but until then
the center of the triangle is lil’ ol’ me

is this a triangle?

[teachers]
no, that’s a shoe

[rebecca]
is this a triangle?

[teachers]
no, that’s you

[rebecca]
so i’m a triangle?

[teachers]
what? no

[rebecca]
one, two, three, six, eight, three, go!

[matt, spoken]
you don’t seem to know how to count

[scott, spoken]
we are sincerely worried about you

[rebecca]
catch me!

[jeff, spoken]
you’re ruining the number!

[teachers]
this angle’s right

[rebecca]
which angle’s right?

[teachers]
no, not right like correct

[rebecca]
ooh, are you erect?

[teachers]
no, 90 degrees

[rebecca]
that’s really erect!

the math of love triangles
is super duper fun

[teachers]
we’re tired of all your tangents
that’s also a triangle pun

[rebecca]
ooh, thanks for teaching me man math!
you all deserve a kiss

[teachers]
lady, we’re all g-y
we get nothing out of this

[rebecca]
neither man will notice
my learning disability
’cause the center of the triangle
is lil’ old
s-xy little baby
me!

- crazy ex girlfriend cast lyrics

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