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creamboat willie - at the movies lyrics

ay, ay, ay, yeah
yeah, yeah

well, tell the truth, in my youth, didn’t used to get a lot of head
i used to be a potterhead, and still i am, sans the “ter”
f+ck that b+tch, get me some herb
smoke it like i’m fassbender in the k!ller, don’t remember?
streaming only, what a joke, the theater’s where a movie goes!

theater’s where i get my hoеs, tuesdays only, saving dough
on the a+list, if you play it right maybe i’ll gеt your ticket
stubs member, but my member ain’t a stub, that b+tch is thick
it’s true! see? now back to the movie
and sorry for ruining the popcorn bucket, oopsie!

here i go

salt and b+tter in my hole, wasn’t worth it, gotta go
previews almost over though, so maybe i can hold it? no!
“pardon me, miss,” sliding past, hurt my p+n+s, acting fast
out the row and out the door and now my foreskin’s feeling sore

in the bathroom, there’s a line, just saw dune a second time
talkin’ ’bout how paul is g+y, how dare you badmouth chalamet!
he’s dylan, wonka, and the king, yeah timmy can do anything
and though g+y’s okay morally, you spoke derogatorily
so f+ck both your asses, but can i slide right past you?
‘cause i gotta wash this seasoning out of my little p+n+s thing
agh! it stings and it burns, then relief
yeah, call me charlie brown ’cause i be saying “good grief”
and like my boy chuck i get mad hoes
she loves peanuts (and not the shows)

but back to the handicap stall ’cause it’s where i’m at
somebody is knockin’ at the door, so my eyes go to the floor
uh+oh! it’s a pair of wheels tryna get in, now it’s an ordeal
but i’m still washing pain out of my little rain spout
“just give me a minute, man,”
“nah, how ’bout you stay out?”

hey, out i go, gotta stay on my toes
’cause i don’t wanna throw hands i ain’t even washed, man
biological attack is what that’d be
no war crimes here, maybe bibi, not me
so i go to the sink, no soap, ‘kay
out of paper towels too, no way
now i’m huffing and i’m puffing ’cause i got all wet for nothing
and it’s like i had some really bad foreplay

but in my f+nny pack’s hand sanitizer
y’all was on moderna, i was getting that pfizer
some got neither, wonder if it haunts them
call ’em all diphallic ’cause they got two johnsons
anyway, hands are clean, now back to the silver screen
walking to the theater door, lady holds it open for me
sorry, but i’m not gonna use it
double+doors, left one’s yours, baby, are you stupid?
i’mma use the right door, see ya later, bye wh0re!

sorry for the gendered insult, i don’t really mean it
so i gotta find a way to try and make this rap more clean
it’s kinda hard, man, spitting all these bars, man
but you know i’m an addict, it’s a habit
“where is he?” i’m in the attic, gotta practice
gotta have it down and pat, it makes you mad
you must relax, it’s just the facts, you’ll never have no bars like that

whack! you a mole, i smack you back into your hole
you a little vermin, hermit, varmint
you’re the chevy chase to my dan harmon
now i’m gonna harm ya, not from my community
you a season 4 b+tch, my ass is from season 3

- creamboat willie lyrics

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