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crypt (rap) - i don't wanna lyrics

[verse]
i don’t wanna shop for no black slacks
i don’t wanna shop for no dress shoes
i don’t wanna shop for a black tie
i don’t wanna shop for a black shoe
i don’t wanna hear a bunch of phone calls
i don’t wanna hear a “i’m sorry for your loss”
i don’t wanna see a bunch of people contactin’ me
actin’ like they even cared at all
i don’t wanna see a bunch of rips
fillin’ up another facebook feed
i don’t wanna another text from a fake friend saying that they’re thinkin’ of me
i don’t want my name in no newspaper
i don’t wanna meet another caretaker
i don’t want another conversation with someone that’s telling me, “god’s plan is greater”
i don’t want another 3+day event
i don’t want no more sadness to pay din’
i don’t want another body to identify on the table that is stainless
i don’t want another plot i have to pick
i don’t want another he+rs+ i have to rent
i don’t want another verse from the bible that the pastor keeps drillin’ inside of my head
i don’t want another visitation to attend
waitin’ for the service to begin
knowin’ half that audience is only there to give a wreath and leave in a 3+day weekend
i don’t wanna have to have another flower pinned to my chest for the moment
knowin’ that i have to place it on the blanket of the casket as we take it to the grave to lower
i don’t wanna be another pallbearer
i don’t wanna see my father fall in tears
i don’t wanna smell the fragrance of the flowers that the funeral home is [?]
i don’t want another front row seat
i don’t wanna hear another eulogy
i don’t wanna listen to the pastor tell me stories of the person right in front of me
i don’t wanna touch another cold hand
i don’t wanna say that i don’t understand
i don’t wanna hear that that’s the sh+ll of a person that i once loved on a casket stand
i don’t wanna see a bunch of old pictures
reminiscin’ on the top ten missin’
lookin’ around through these watery eyes for attention to stop them from drippin’
i don’t wanna have to listen to another sermon
i can’t pay attention ’cause my heart is hurtin’
knowin’ that i’ll never ever see them again
and this pain that i have is eternal
i don’t wanna hear another organ play another sad song like “amazing grace”
or “go rest high on that mountain” while i’m shoutin’
askin’ why he couldn’t let ’em stay
i don’t wanna lock arms with my older brother, standin’ over atop a corpse
i don’t wanna say no more last words as they close the casket door
i don’t wanna feel the dead weight in my hands as we pick up the body on the count of three
knowin’ that the person that i loved my entire life is lyin’ next to me
i don’t wanna load another [?] up
i don’t want another purple [?] in my truck
i don’t want another funeral procession drivin’ through the town, messin’ traffic up
i don’t wanna make another right turn
goin’ through the cemetery gates
only seein’ just a handful of my family members show up at the wake
i don’t wanna have to pull another casket from the back of the he+rs+ as i’m fightin’ back cryin’
and carry it right to the burial sight
and then sit at the side while everyone is silent
and watch as they drop the casket in the ground
slowly now to six feet down
and look around as we all cry and we all say our final goodbyes
i don’t wanna watch ’em pour the dirt on
i don’t wanna accept that they’re really gone
i don’t wanna forget that they ever existed
actin’ like my life will continue on
i don’t wanna see the time go fast
and watch the straw on their graves grow into grass
slowly thinkin’ less and less about them while they lay alone under a stone plaque
i just sayin’ that i need some answers
somethin’ that can make some sense of this
somethin’ that can put my mind at ease
somethin’ that gives me a reason to live
until then, i’m just out here a ghost
steady, lookin’ for my faith
forever searchin’ for my soul
but i feel like i’m walkin’ in place

- crypt rap lyrics

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