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d hawk - i decided lyrics

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i decided
i’m better alone
i want to return to the sides and
just be on my own
yeah i’ll be fine
yeah i’ll be good
you look at me like i am lying
i am so misunderstood

i feel like n-body really knows me
most don’t even notice me
outside of my crew
how can you clap for me
while i’m out on the stage
but see me face to face
and just look away?

people i swear they cant change
i switched schools yet they are the same
no seriously what is my name?
exactly i’m still that kid
except now i ain’t bad just rapping

hey look it’s that kid
why he be walking alone?
always got on headphones
why he always look lost?
his true thoughts are unknown

not sure if i’m soft-spoken
or they are ignoring me
since i stopped smoking
these thoughts are destroying me
and people i used to call friends are ignoring me

or am i avoiding them
yo dusean’s not himself today
so pretend not to notice him
even strong people can feel weak
something really folded him
they come try to help me

but i won’t let them in
here i am at lunch
music it flows through my dome
write lyrics out on paper
and i type them out on my phone
and i read it throughout my cl-sses
and hate it by the time i get home

i’ll work this out by myself
the way i do everything else
just me and this pencil
inside my 10’’ cell

where i am currently located
the eyes are window to the soul

that’s why i hide mine
that kids in the zone
my hat is tilted real low
striding real slow

i’m in the ocean

i lie here and just float
i continue to backstroke

lord you’re my last hope
to get back to the lake of peace
jesus please come and save me
before these thoughts break me

i beg you to come save me
from myself
and anyone else
that tries to do me harm

i look at that list
i’m on the top of it

i look at the cuts on my arm fresh
separated my flesh
with a blade
now look at this mess that i made

i post it on my page
i’m.almost.ok
2000 followers strong
that’s 2000 sources of anonymous love

for a few years this has been going on
how does n-body notice something’s wrong
that’s until i write a song
then they see what was there all along

emotion i’ve hidden it
the story of
another eccedentesiast

knowledge is worth more than diamonds
right now i feel penniless
i’m broken

will i make it through i highly doubt it
so what i cut cry and writeabout it
as the ocean storms i pray a drought hits
these waves are too high and i am drowning

by these bad thoughts i’m surrounded
i want to make it to the lake
but i keep rerouting

i just gotta stay strong throughout this
last time how did
i make it out this

face in pillow i am shouting
and wailing
no hope of prevailing
sick of failing

what a wonderful villain
scribbling in these lyrics
casted out by civilians

they look up to me like i’m above them
but i feel so far beneath
guess i’ll just suck my teeth
and hold my head up high

and wipe away my tears
as if i never cried
and take in a deep breath
and let out a huge sigh

- d hawk lyrics

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