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dave goulder - the turntable song lyrics

[verse 1]
‘twas half past five on a wednesday morn, the driver and his mate
came hurtlin’ out o’ the loco shed in a d+mn great number eight
the fireman wiped his greasy hands as they rolled along the track
to pick up a gallon o’ water and a couple o’ tubs o’ slack
couple o’ tubs o’ slack

[verse 2]
they waited till the clock was showin’ a couple o’ hundred pound
they took her to the turntable and they quickly turned her round
but when they went to park her, they made their big mistake
for they left her on a gradient and forgot about the brake
forgot about the brake

[verse 3]
it happened when the turntable was only halfway round
the engine’s wheels began to turn with an ominous rumbling sound
the driver when he saw the thing, began to scream and spit
as the mighty engine humped its back and plunged into the pit
plunged into the pit

[verse 4]
he went to tell the foreman. he was quaking at the knees
saying, “sir, you’ve got an engine parked at forty+five degrees.”
the foreman turned a ghastly green and grabbed the telephone
then, half a bottle of aspirins and he caught the next bus home
caught the next bus home
[verse 5]
they fetched the gang from nottingham and they soon set about
with chains and jacks and dirty words, they got the d+mn thing out
the fireman lost his shovel, now he’s sweeping up the coal
and i haven’t seen the driver since, but i think he’s on the dole
think he’s on the dole

- dave goulder lyrics

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