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dave portnoy, josh richards - smallest man lyrics

[chorus: josh richards]
i said trust me
caught your pants on fire
tinder, bumble, raya
knew you was a liar
you’re a douchebag
you just made a new rival

i said trust me
caught your pants on fire
tinder, bumble, raya
knew you was a liar
yeah you f+cked up
its about to get gory
go and post it on your instagram story

[verse 1: josh richards]
yeah, you say you remember everything
i guess not cause you forgot about your wedding ring
this ain’t a subtweet, i ain’t coming subliminal
you’re great at being country
without the 2nd syllable
my fist plus your face, simple addition
the way you did her wrong, man its sickening
imma kick you d+ck in
then give you an adult circumcision
think we in kentucky
way i fry you likе some chicken
but you’re from ok
wеll ok if you say so
kinda ironic cause soon your getting this ko
you shorter than me

hey zb why you handin’ out these stds
these girls is itchy in they jeans askin’ what you mean
they askin’ doctors for their expertise

gon’ need some antifreeze
rest in peace if you ever try to mess with me
i’m coming at you with more arms than a centipede

there’s something in the orange
and its you behind these bars
(b+tch)

[arrest audio]
zb: i will get back in this truck right now if you let me out of these handcuffs if you don’t its gonna be a mistake sir, i promise
officer: get back in your truck or go to jail i don’t care
zb: i’ll go to jail, lets do it
i will+
i will h+

[chorus: josh richards]
i said trust me
caught your pants on fire
tinder, bumble, raya
knew you was a liar
you’re a douchebag
you just made a new rival

i said trust me
caught your pants on fire
tinder, bumble, raya
knew you was a liar
yeah you f+cked up
its about to get gory
go and post it on your instagram story

[verse 2: dave portnoy]
itty bity zach, sh+tty sh+tty tats
ugly in the face
there’s no cure for that
country singin’ boss baby
get that boy a snack
throw another temper tantrum
its time for a nap
think you’re on some sh+t tryna diss taylor swift
did a hundo gram stories apologizing like a b+tch
5’5”, 5’6”
get some chapstick for those lips
lookin like a little kid
smallest man who ever lived
lyin’ zach bryan i know all this sh+t’s deep
bet your raya profile said that you’re 6 feet
from the looks of all your tweets
i’d say you got a booze problem
such an alcoholic
alcohols got a you problem
if zach is awake, i know that he’s been drinking
head looks like a lego
hair like homer simpson!
this is for the women that you’ve cheated and neglected
music is infectious, your p+n+s is infected
you gave out stds and then you start to spiral
zach that’s not what we mean by going viral
if you meet another girl off an instagram caption
i hope they know that feelings aren’t the only thing they catchin’
little evil face tried to split up bri and grace
your whole styles morgan wallen
tyler childers, copy paste
you think that you’re hard
close but no cigar
who’s idea was it to give this oompa loompa a guitar
cheatin’ ass boy
your existence is insulting me
you can’t even put the adult in adultery
don’t take accountability for anything you did
can’t blame you just a 30 year old kid
never seen someone so scared of what the people say
would have thought that ndas were in your dna
too drunk for fenway
zach godd+mn
even noah knows
you’re a real kahan man
consider this a warning for the next girl that dates you
we know for a fact that your whole band hates you
think you had some hot sh+t
me and josh froze it
always been a loser now the whole world knows it

[chorus: josh richards]
i said trust me
caught your pants on fire
tinder, bumble, raya
knew you was a liar
you’re a douchebag
you just made a new rival

i said trust me
caught your pants on fire
tinder, bumble, raya
knew you was a liar
yeah you f+cked up
its about to get gory
go and post it on your instagram story

spoken:[outro]
i mean
we should have known the first signs
who picks kanye over taylor?!
man he’s 5’2” and kicked peaches outta the dressing room
smallest man who ever lived
you already know it were smoking on that zb pack all night long
72 hats still bald as f+ck
needs to go fix his hairline
send him to turkey headass

how lucky is bri, to be free of zb, and his stds
how lucky is bri, to be free of zb, and his stds

- dave portnoy josh richards lyrics

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