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david a. scott - total eclipse of the heart: literal video version lyrics

[verse 1]
(pan the room)
random use of candles, empty bottles, and cloth
and can you see me through this fan?
(slo-mo dove)
creepy doll, a window, and what looks like a bathrobe
then, a dim-lit shot of dangling b-lls
(metaphor?)
close-up of some candles and dramatically posing
then, stock footage of a moon in the sky
(bottle shot)
messing up my close-up of with a floating blue curtain
now let’s see who’s coming in from outside
(double doors open)
why aren’t i reacting in this shot?
(ringo starr? lined eyes)
guess i should be acting but i’m not
(door’s ajar) wander through a hall with doors that magically open
and this cl-ssroom has a fan
(open shirts)
now it’s getting creepy you can tell by my staring
it’s a long time since i’ve been with a man
(stupid chair)
emo kid is throwing slo-mo dove at my face
i guess that means he just flipped me the bird
(locker room)
staring at the swim team gets you k!lled by a gang
of dancing ninja men who know how to twirl
(spin around. ninjas!)
then a bunch of preppies make a toast
(drinking wine. douchebags!)

[chorus]
most of it just ends up on the floor
and they shouldn’t fence at night
or they’re going to hurt the gymnasts
why do they play football inside?
here’s another shot of fencing
and i’ve mostly been lit from behind
watch these shadows run off

i walk onto a terrace, where i think i’m alone
but arthur fonzarelli’s got an army of clones
(fonzi’s been cloned!)
they do the macarena
but i’m still not impressed
they beg for me to dance with them
but not in this dress!
i’ll pose like rocky tonight!
i’m running up a bunch of stairs
(strip football and surprise mirror!)

[post-chorus]
here’s where i pretend to be eva peron
look at me, i’m lifting my arms
there’s nothing else to shoot
so just zoom the camera under this arch

leaning on myself because there’s two of me here
but now, there’s only one in this shot
i pull my feathered hair
whenever i see floating cloth

[interlude]
[woman]
ooh, ooh, oooooh, i’ve gotta use the bathroom but the door’s locked! can you help me?
[man]
i’ll open the door for you. -grunts-
[woman]
oh thank you sir! how can i ever repay you?
[man]
how about a towel?
[group]
hey guys check this out! whoa. (hey don’t do that dude! come on!) wait, it’s supposed to take the cloth & leave everything else on the table! i don’t know what happened. not like that, it’s the other way! (yeah, pull it like that!) no, stop! you’re making it worse!
[accented man]
alright which of you preppies put gold dust in my fencing mask? -laughter-
[woman]
hey, this isn’t the ladies’ room!

[verse 2]
(blind possessed choir boys.)
get out of my way! i’ve gotta pee!
(zombie cult?)
(aah flying altar boy!)

never mind. i just went on the floor!
now i need to find a mop!
(look at me now!)
emo kid wears too much make-up
now watch a bunch of half-naked guys
(hairless chests)
as they dance around in diapers
and i’ve joined the glee club of the d-mned
(reference joke!)
look the fog machine’s on!
what kind of private school would let in these kind of guys?
it started out as hogwarts, now it’s lord of the flies!
(i hated that book.)
i’m swaying side to side
these dancers need to stop
the g-yest man on earth would call this over the top!

[chorus]
i whip my head to the right!
i’ll never go to church again
i think i lost a contact lens
when did spazzing out qualify as a dance?

kneeling like i want to throw up
what the effing cr-p?
that angel guy just felt me up!

here’s a line of guys. i was wearing a dress
but now they’ve got me wearing a suit
one kid’s running late
i think he’s too young for this school
i’m totally shaking his hand
(mullet with headlights?)
(over-surprised guy. weirded out. oohweeeoooh)

- david a scott lyrics

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